Language jokes

Roses are red, violets are bl-- oh yeah, I'm bad at jokes.

I can't not believe you stupid fucks. This isn't funny. Just like a bunch of cunts not to believe there is nothing can't do.

BTW what do you call a manly woman's cunt? Nothing. Who gives a fuck?

You know, they didn't add the word "retard" into the dictionary for nothing.

What can you break, even if you never pick it up or touch it?

The E and F in Orphan stands for Every one in their Family.

Me: yep they definitely have one 100% 💯

Me rn: "Yo yo yo, for pre-K I went to K.I.S.S. a school."

My friend: "What is K.I.S.M.A.?"

Me: "K.I.S.M.A. balls!"

My cousin’s friend spelled “racist” wrong and when my cousin showed me, the first thing I said to my cousin’s friend is “Go to Grammarly. They REALLY teach you spelling.”

OK, OK, eat your shirt.

How many letters are in the English Alphabet?

Twenty-two. ET went home, P ran down his leg, and he took ME with him.

Do you know Candice?

"Candice balls" fit in yo mouth.

What's a dead person's favorite sentence?

"I made it."

Spell IHOP, then say "ness."

Me: Knock, knock.

Other person: Who’s there?

Me: Atch.

Other person: Atch who?

Me: Bless you!

My friend asks me what does "idk" mean. I said, "I dion't know." My friend says, "You mean I don't know." I said, "That's what I said!"

What language do Gays speak?

HOMOGRAPHY maybe...

What do you call a cute door?

Adorable.

Replace the v in Venus with a p.

A B C deez nuts!

You are shore to find loads of jokes funny even if I can’t kelp you find the right ones.

Loads of jokes are funny as I’m shore you shall sea.

A man walks into an enchanted forest and tries to cut down a talking tree.

“You can’t cut me down,” the tree exclaims, “I’m a talking tree!” The man responds, “You may be a talking tree, but you will have dialogue.”