The 60+ Best Feed Jokes

give a man a fish feed him for a day

give a man a poison fish feed him for a lifetime

Whats red, 6 inches long and makes my girlfriend cry when I feed it to her ?

Her miscarriage

Health feed fights grand gucxsrdcjcgfdz taxicab heaven reflection during harvesting

Sneed feed seed

Formerly chuck's!

So a woman gets into a car accident and is in the hospital and the doctor goes on to tell the man what is going on; Doctor: "so your wife she is paralyzed from the neck down" and as the doctor goes he says all the things the man must do for her like feed her, dress her, etc. Then the man says " why, WHY ME!" Then the doctor leans over and whispers in the mans ear and says " I'm just fuckin with u she's DEAD!"

That is a "Penny-Farthing" bicycle, Dimes if you feed it beans.

What is 6" long, bright red and your wife cries when you feed it to her?

Her miscarriage.

What's 6ft long, red, and my girlfriend cries when i feed it to her? A miscarriage.

why are dolphins so smart? Because within three hours they can train a human to stand at the edge of the pool and feed them fish!

The other day I commented a dark humor joke on a post about a guy who lost his best friend. The joke was “I was so drunk last night I threw a mushroom at a midget and said ‘grow mario grow’ He commented “What the hell is wrong with you”and I said “IKR I really gotta work on my alcoholic issues.” He then replied “This is a post about my dead best friend get the fuck off my feed I don’t even know you.” And so I said “Well then get to know me, I could become your new best friend!”

We were so poor when we were kids, dad used to jerk off the dog to feed the cat.

for 15 cents a day you can feed an African child they eat spare change i guess

Once I asked Siri to tell me a joke and it asked me “what is the difference between a large pizza and you”one can feed a family

What do they feed a gorilla in Paris? Ape suzettes.

What do parents feeding their kids and terrorist have in common? “Here comes the airplane!”

There are three men walking down the road and they come across a farm that is for sale. The three men look at each other and put all their money together to buy the farm. On that farm there is a cow a monkey and a bunch of cow food. The men are out of money and the farm is going out of business. One of the men's sees that there is a contest for the biggest cow in the county. They entered the contest but it's so thin. Every time they tried to feed the cattle it would poop and lose weight again, so one of them in suggested that they put a cork up the cows behind. The first guy says okay then go put a cork there. I don't want to do it you do it no you do it. The third guy says let's just get the monkey to do it. And the monkey puts the cork in the couch behind. They win the biggest cow contest and get the money they need to save the farm. The second guy realizes that they need to take the cork out of cow. Guys we need to take the cork out of the cow he says. Well I'm not going to do it you do it, no you do it. The third guy says let's just get the monkey to do it again. So the monkey uncorks a cow. And there was a huge explosion.... a few days later the three men wake up in the hospital. The doctor walks up to the first man what happened he asks the first man replies all I remember is that a horrible sound. The doctor walks up to the second man and asks what happened. All I remember is that horrible smell.... The doctor walks up to the third man and again ask the same question. The third man looks at him and says all I remember is that poor poor monkey trying to put the cork back in.