What’s the difference between England’s football team and a tea bag?
The tea bag stays in the cup longer.
Today in math class we had to do an activity where we had to flip coins. The teacher said that we had to flip some coins, remove all of the heads, count them, and put the rest of the coins back in the cup and repeat until we had no coins left. I’m not sure what we were supposed to get out of that activity, but I got 15 dead bodies.
It’s the World Cup Final, and a man makes his way to his seat right next to the pitch. He sits down, noticing that the seat next to him is empty. He leans over and asks his neighbor if someone will be sitting there. ‘No,’ says the neighbor. ‘The seat is empty.’ ‘This is incredible,’ said the man. ‘Who in their right mind would have a seat like this for the Final and not use it?’ The neighbor says, ‘Well actually the seat belongs to me. I was supposed to come with my wife, but she passed away. This is the first World Cup Final we haven’t been to together since we got married.’ ‘Oh, I’m so sorry to hear that. That’s terrible….But couldn’t you find someone else, a friend, relative or even a neighbor to take her seat?’ The man shakes his head. ‘No,’ he says. ‘They’re all at the funeral.’
me and my friend were roasting each other she : you look like a reese’s cup me:your so old your pubic hairs are 50 shades of gray
22 ants were playing football in a saucer. One ant said to another one, “We’ll have to play better tomorrow. We’re playing in the cup!”
A guy went to the doctor and told him that whenever he drinks a cup of tea his eye hurts ,the doctor brought him a cup and asked him to drink … when he finished the doctor told him : from now on take off the spoon.
I asked a man for ten dollars for a cup of coffee, The man said coffee was only a quarter, I told him I was putting all my begs in one ask it.
Liam Gallagher went into a café for a cup of tea, the assistant asked him if “he wanted a roll with it”