What’s the difference between England’s football team and a tea bag?

The tea bag stays in the cup longer.

Today in math class we had to do an activity where we had to flip coins. The teacher said that we had to flip some coins, remove all of the heads, count them, and put the rest of the coins back in the cup and repeat until we had no coins left. I’m not sure what we were supposed to get out of that activity, but I got 15 dead bodies.

What do you call someone that illegally transports cups? - A s-mug-gler

Yo mama so dumb she got hit by a cup and told the police she got mugged.

what do you call a sad cup of coffee?
Answer: Depresso

What’s the difference between England and a tea bag? – The tea bag stays longer in a cup.

It’s the World Cup Final, and a man makes his way to his seat right next to the pitch. He sits down, noticing that the seat next to him is empty. He leans over and asks his neighbor if someone will be sitting there. ‘No,’ says the neighbor. ‘The seat is empty.’ ‘This is incredible,’ said the man. ‘Who in their right mind would have a seat like this for the Final and not use it?’ The neighbor says, ‘Well actually the seat belongs to me. I was supposed to come with my wife, but she passed away. This is the first World Cup Final we haven’t been to together since we got married.’ ‘Oh, I’m so sorry to hear that. That’s terrible….But couldn’t you find someone else, a friend, relative or even a neighbor to take her seat?’ The man shakes his head. ‘No,’ he says. ‘They’re all at the funeral.’

me and my friend were roasting each other she : you look like a reese’s cup me:your so old your pubic hairs are 50 shades of gray

How do you make a dead baby float?

1 cup rootbeer 2 scoops dead baby

22 ants were playing football in a saucer. One ant said to another one, “We’ll have to play better tomorrow. We’re playing in the cup!”

What is a cup called when they show a ton of emotions???

Answer: Expresso!!! (KILL MEH)

How does Moses make his cup of tea Hebrews it

A guy went to the doctor and told him that whenever he drinks a cup of tea his eye hurts ,the doctor brought him a cup and asked him to drink … when he finished the doctor told him : from now on take off the spoon.

what do you call a sad cup of coffee?

Depresso!!! LOL XD XD XD

I asked a man for ten dollars for a cup of coffee, The man said coffee was only a quarter, I told him I was putting all my begs in one ask it.

Someone threw a cup at my eye. I told the 911 that I was mugged

what do you call a cup with a handle?

a mug! HAHA ha… my parents just got a divorce :(

What’s Africas greatest sporting achievement? The 2018 world cup…

What do you call a dog that is part pug, part poodle, and part cup?

A muggle! 🤠🤠🤠🤠🥴

A vampire walks into a bar and orders a cup of hot water. The bartender asks, “I thought you guys only drink blood?”

The vampire pulls out a used tampon and says, “I’m making tea.”

one time in camp i kissed my bunkmate bret in the shower. he cupped my breasts and lathered them in prell, But im totally not gay… :)

Liam Gallagher went into a café for a cup of tea, the assistant asked him if “he wanted a roll with it”

I ask my sister to get me a cup of fruit punch. I realized she was taking a bit so I walk to the kitchen and noticed that she spilled it on herself. I asked her how did you do that but there was no response.

Sheila, the Aussie housewife, got out of the shower and slipped on the bathroom floor. Instead of falling over forwards or backwards, she did the splits and suctioned cupped herself to the floor. She yelled out for her husband, “Bruce! Bruce!” and he came running in. “Bruce, I’ve bloody suctioned myself to the floor” she said. “S’truth, Sheila!” Bruce said, and tried to pull her up. “You’re stuck fast girl. I’ll go across the road and get me mate Cobber.” They came back and they both tried to pull her up from the floor. “No way, we can’t do it!” Cobber said, “So let’s try Plan B” “Plan B?” exclaimed Bruce, “What’s that?” “I’ll go home and get me hammer and chisel and we’ll break the tiles under her” replied Cobber. “Spot on” Bruce said, “While you’re doing that, I’ll stay here and play with her nipples” “Play with her nipples?” Cobber said, “Not exactly a good time for that mate” "No… " Bruce replied, “But I reckon if I can get her wet enough, we can slide her into the kitchen where the tiles are a lot cheaper”