Kid jokes

What has 4 legs and 1 arm?

A pitbull dog coming back from the kids playground.

Q: How do you get the retard kid out of the tree?

A: Wave at him.

What do you call an autistic kid that’s good at art?

Artistic.

Those poor kids at Sandy Hook, all they wanted was books. Instead, they got magazines.

Kid with Cancer: "When I get older, I want to be a movie star or a singer."

Nurse: *Laughs*

Kid: "Why are you laughing?"

Nurse: "When I get OLDER."

Proceeds to laugh.

How do you keep a blind kid busy? Give him sandpaper and tell him it's a find-a-word. 😂🤣

This guy looked down the aisle and asked, "Hey, are those kids all yours?" And I replied: "No, I work for a condom company, and these kids are just all of my complaints."

Why does a leaf fall faster than an emo kid? Because the emo hangs itself.

Teacher: "Ok class, what animal jumps the highest?"

Kid: "A leopard."

Quiet kid: "No, it's emo kids. Some of them are still in the air."

Kid: "Broooooooooooo."

Why did the depressed kid jump off the bike? It was free depressed day.

Me: Hey, that's a really heavy bag, do you have a lot of books and magazines in there?

The Quiet Kid: Yeah, magazines.....

Alright kids! Find a good place to stop! Then, out of the blue, Billy died. But hey, he went to a better place.

How do you get a fat kid to lose weight?

You pay the ice cream man to keep on driving. IDK.

I saw this kid who looked depressed, so I threw a torch at him. I thought I would brighten up his day.

I bought an orphan kid an iPhone.

Guess what? It had no home button.

Teacher: Hey Timmy (the quiet kid), what comes after X?

The quiet kid: Splosion.

Teacher: What comes after A?

The quiet kid: AK-47.

Teacher: Faints.

What were the emo kid's pronouns?

Was/were.

(Bus Driver) What did you learn in school today?

(Kid) We learned that you are a sussy baka.

(Bus Driver) Oh yeah? Well, I quit!

(Kid) Quit what?

(Bus Driver) Living.

(Kid) But it was a joke!

(Bus Driver) Doesn't matter. I will die, but you will still be alive.

(Kid) Ok.

(Bus Driver) That was a joke, too!

What hit the ground first, the feather or the depressed kid?

The feather, the rope was stopping the kid.

I gave a deaf kid air pods for his birthday.