Kid jokes
Why can't fat kids play poker?
They eat all the chips.
I put my heart and soul in my report, then my teacher says:
"Hey KIDS were going to repeat making current events about our state til we DIE."
....No wonder when kids leave school they're soulless.
RIP Meh Soul.
So Kobe Bryant walked into a bar, just kidding, he's dead and his fame went spiraling out of control.
I eat kids.
There was a cannibal who had a wife and eight kids.
There was an emo kid in their room, boom, they're all gone, now.
When I was a kid, my father would tell me that the black Santa Claus was coming to our house for Christmas. So, instead of putting out cookies and milk, we would put out cornbread and purple Kool-Aid.
What’s the difference between Texas and Flint, Michigan?
Nothing; no one cares how much lead is in the kids.
So a kid asks his dad, "Why was I born?"
The dad replies, "I thought that girl was dead!"
Why do people misplace 9/11 with emo kids? They both have a high death count.
There's a disabled kid in my class, right? Oops, should've brought my Hot Wheels tracks.
Kid 1: I like you! Do you like me?
Kid 2: No. You never asked if I love you!
Kid 1: Aw, do you love me?
Kid 2: No!
How to punish a blind kid, rearrange his bedroom.
What do you call a group of sped kids with AK-47s?
Special forces.
Time for double joke Tuesday.
What is a bird's favorite letter?
A C gull.
So I won a round of CSGO with my team, then on VC, some kid trash talked me.
Kid: You're a dick, you know!
Me: And you're a pussy, you know?
Dad: What do you call a crazy creeper?
Mom: Shit, I don't know...
Kid: Crrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!
Dad: That's my boy's!!!
Why did the orphan not call 911 when he saw a tower catch fire?
'Cause he did not want any kids to go through the same pain.
Teacher: “Alright, we’re going to play Kahoot! Please use your real name.”
That one kid putting Joe: -_-
Teacher: Who’s Joe?
The whole class: JOE MAMA!
Why was the American kid late to school?
Because he was too busy putting on his bulletproof vest.
When I'm chilling and a little kid ruins my moment.