Kid Jokes

I heard that Jimmy Savile never wanted to be famous... All he ever wanted was to settle down, and have kids.

Wa do u call a kid in a hot tub Vegetable soup

I say 1 2 3 all the kids bullied me but now they're not so cool cuz I shot up the school

Why could the kid go rock wall climbing?

Because, every time he moved his leg upward his prospetic leg fell off

Kids are like a box of chocolates they taste so good and u never know what u are going to get

Im jealous of cancer my dad beat me but never beat cancer.

A guy is bankrupt so he gives his son a duck and tells him to go sell it for as much as he can.so the kid goes on the street to sell the duck. A prostitute walks by and says I'll f--ck you for $10. The boy says I would but I don't have any money. She says ok I'll take the duck instead. He says ok so they go up stairs and f—ck. The prostitute says that's the best sex I've ever had. I'll give you the duck back and we can do it again. So they do and he gets the duck back. But when they go downstairs the duck gets hit by a car. And the guy that hit the duck feels so bad that he gives the kid $25. So when he gets home his father asks him why he looks so tired. The boy says well I got a f—ck for a duck, a duck for a f—ck, and $25 for a f—cked up fuck.

A bully walks up to a kid named Billy to insult him and steal his lunch money. Later that night when he is at home, the bully’s father comes into his room to insult him and take the lunch money he stole. The father walks down stair to check on his father in the living room. When he walks in, his father insults him and takes the lunch money. The grandfather of the bully walks into the back yard and in the dark is Billy. The grandfather walks up to him and says “Where’s my money you worthless old fart.”

what do pedophiles and Xboxs have in common?

They both get turned on by kids

What's the difference between drugs and kids?

I don't sell drugs.

POV an Asian kidnapper kidnapped an Asian kid and the kidnapper called the kids mom then the mom said no its fine my kid got a b he failed and the kidnapper let him go saying he doesn't need a failiure

ssssssssssss

BofA these nutsssss

What do you call a Down syndrome kid who has been physically abused by older teenagers and her parents for a total of 16 years and has red marks all over there body?

Not funny because Down syndrome jokes aren't funny ;)