Kid jokes

How do tourists feed their kids?

Here comes the airplane, here comes the second one.

Tits are like Lego bricks. They're there for the kid, but dad ends up playing with them.

Yo mama so stupid, she told the police a kid raped her.

What are the kids addicted to these days? Juulius Caesar (Juuls).

Dad, why are we here?

Because you're not loved.

What do you call an emo kid at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start.

What do you call something that eats kids?

An upset mother.

What did the blind kid get for Christmas? He hasn’t seen it yet... What did the kids with no arms get? He doesn’t know, he’s still trying to figure out how to open it. :))))

What do you call a kid on the track team who isn't on the track team?

A school shooter.

If an emo kid and the quiet kid had a fight, the quiet kid would win because the emo kid would cut himself to death.

Tibia honest, it takes a lot of spine to memorize all the bones in the skeletal system. I mean, there's a skele-ton of em! You gotta be boned up for the skeletal system exam, buddy chum pal. Now that was a humerus ribtickling skelepun. Besides, if ya don't know all of the bones in the skeletal system, get boned, fucking numbskull. Did those tickle your funny bone? Now I've been working down to the bone typing these puns, kid. Now if you hate all these, I won't be bothered, I got thick skin! But first, lemme take a skelfie in the skelevator playing my trom-bone. Now, I gotta go to Grillby's. They got a discount on spare-ribs. Bone-voyage, my homeslice breadslice dawg.

What does a bullied kid say during a game of Kahoot?

"I'd like to Kahoot up this school."

Once I threw the ball at a wheelchair kid. Now we are playing Rocket League! :D

So the other day, I saw a child in a wheelchair.

He was getting bullied a lot, so I came up and said, "Why don't you stand up to those bullies?"

"Hey, kid, why are you so fat?"

"Why did you insult him? That's not nice."

"It won't matter, he's deaf."

Tumblr people: "There are an infinite amount of genders."

The cannibal kid: "Bitch, please. There's just one gender: Food."

I saw a kid in the yard and I asked where are your parents.

Then I got fired from the orphanage.

Why did the kid cry?

His dad didn't get the milk.

*School Shooter Walks In*

That one kid who plays "Pumped Up Kicks" at max volume.

I told kids to make a family tree. God, I love working at the orphanages.