Kid jokes
Why'd Biden get fired from the supermarket?
He kept telling little kids they smell like freshly baked bread.
Son to mother: "Mom, all the kids in the school are making fun of me because I am still a virgin."
Mother: "Well, start giving them bad grades, and they will stop."
What's a similarity of an orphan and a deaf kid?
They both can't hear their parents.
Are you a school bus? Because I want to fill you with kids.
I asked a kid why he was so blue.
Didn't realize his parents were choking him out.
I asked my kid to give me a hand. That motherfucker cried while charging his mechanical arm.
What do Ben 10 and a disabled kid have in common? They both slap their wrist.
Kid 1: I like you! Do you like me?
Kid 2: No. You never asked if I love you!
Kid 1: Aw, do you love me?
Kid 2: No!
What do you call a disabled kid's sweat?
VEGETABLE OIL!
Bully: Have you ever heard of a brain?
Stupid kid: No.
Bully: You should go get one!
Stupid kid: Wwwwaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh!
Store owner: You have to be 40 inches tall to go into the adult section.
Kid: Please.
Store owner: Oh okay, but get on your tippy toes.
Kid: Everybody is hugging.
Q: Why can kids relate to dogs?
A: They are noticed for 13 years, then left for no one to touch again.
Why are adopted kids better than bio kids? Because their parents actually wanted them.
Kid 1: Words can't describe how ugly you are.
Kid 2: Words can describe how beautiful you are.
Kid 1: Aw, thanks!
Kid 2: But numbers can. 0/10
Santa's sack is big because he only comes once a year, but his sack is SO BIG after containing the lovely eggnog he has that those weigh the sleigh.
He never had kids because he comes in the chimney.
I intern at an orphanage that burned down this weekend with 30 kids inside.
Thankfully, I don’t have to call and tell their parents.
Why did the orphan not call 911 when he saw a tower catch fire?
'Cause he did not want any kids to go through the same pain.
Kid says to genie,
"I want to be like Batman!"
Kid goes home, both of them are dead.
I beat up a blind kid, but he says he's the strongest. He never saw that one!
I told my kids to smile with the monkeys in the open zoo.
They never got together at all.