Kid jokes

A kid tell me he was gonna f**k my mom on Fortnite! So I told him I was gonna double pump his mom until she was wet like moisty meyers.

Like if you're not a gay.

Dislike if you're furry.

Repost if you HATE blacks.

Comment for VBUCKS.

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I was walking home when I saw children crossing the street on their own. I went towards him and tapped his shoulder and said, "Hey, little kid, you are not supposed to be walking on your own." The kid turns out to be a dwarf.

What if some kid was like, "I'm going to shoot up the school!", and then someone just pulls up with a reverse card?

I asked this disabled kid what his favorite TV show is. He looked at me blankly and said "My favorite TV show is Vegetales."

The kid with a gun walked into my classroom and fucking shot the teacher.

He pointed the gun at me and asked, "What's 2+2?" I answer him and he writes the answer down on his test. He did this with every kid. He got a 100%, expelled, and a lifetime in prison. Hey, at least he gets free food.

What's a similarity of an orphan and a deaf kid?

They both can't hear their parents.

Are you a school bus? Because I want to fill you with kids.

What do Ben 10 and a disabled kid have in common? They both slap their wrist.

I asked a kid why he was so blue.

Didn't realize his parents were choking him out.

Why'd Biden get fired from the supermarket?

He kept telling little kids they smell like freshly baked bread.

Kid 1: I like you! Do you like me?

Kid 2: No. You never asked if I love you!

Kid 1: Aw, do you love me?

Kid 2: No!

Kid 1: Words can't describe how ugly you are.

Kid 2: Words can describe how beautiful you are.

Kid 1: Aw, thanks!

Kid 2: But numbers can. 0/10

Okay, so one time a deaf kid got into a car accident, but he didn't herd in on the news.

Bully: Have you ever heard of a brain?

Stupid kid: No.

Bully: You should go get one!

Stupid kid: Wwwwaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh!

Store owner: You have to be 40 inches tall to go into the adult section.

Kid: Please.

Store owner: Oh okay, but get on your tippy toes.

Kid: Everybody is hugging.

Why did the orphan not call 911 when he saw a tower catch fire?

'Cause he did not want any kids to go through the same pain.

Q: Why can kids relate to dogs?

A: They are noticed for 13 years, then left for no one to touch again.

Why are adopted kids better than bio kids? Because their parents actually wanted them.

Santa's sack is big because he only comes once a year, but his sack is SO BIG after containing the lovely eggnog he has that those weigh the sleigh.

He never had kids because he comes in the chimney.

I walk up to a kid. I ask where his parents are, and he started crying. Then I walked out of the orphanage.