Joke jokes
What did one twin say to the other?
"Watch out for the plane!"
It’s amazing just how paranoid Hitler was.
In Hitler’s Germany, it was illegal to make jokes about him or his regime.
Come on! Forbidding Germans from making jokes? Isn’t that a bit like forbidding Americans from eating salad?
If you were a room in my house, I’d make you the basement.
So I could put kids inside you.
Your cut [is] so broke, even Bob the Builder can't fix it.
Q. What’s black and blue and doesn’t like to have sex?
A. The little girl in my trunk.
What did the Titanic say as it sank?
I’m nominating all passengers for the Ice Bucket Challenge!
What’s the difference between a Catholic and a rabbit?
One has kids to protect from predators, and the other has kids for predators.
Where do terrorists go for food? The Allah snack bar.
Why was 6 scared of 7?
Because 7 8 9.
Why is 10 scared?
Because it is in the huddle of 9/11.
When I get jokes. They aren't f****** restarted like you.
My sister.
What is it called when you have four white people in the car?
Clear windows.
Me: You have terrible jokes.
Mum: Shows me a mirror.
My girlfriend dumped me, so I stole her wheelchair.
Guess who came crawling back? Sadly, the hardest part to eat of the vegetable is the wheelchair.
Imagine a white van. Now imagine a white guy in the driver seat with a sombrero on and his arm out the window, and on the side of the van it says "Free Candy." But there's blood all over the van and a dead clown in the back.
Q: Where do you bury the people killed in 9/11?
A: It's already done for you.
What does WTC stand for?
"What Trade Centre?"
Hey, you there, were you raised on a chicken farm? 'Cause you really know how to raise a cock!
Yo mom's so old, she went into the museum and walked out with a raise.
What do you call a Mexican without a lawnmower?
Unemployed.