Joke jokes

What is red and green and goes 100 miles per hour?

A frog in a blender.

What do you call a person whose Lymphoma keeps recurring?

A Lymphomaniac.

What did the bus driver say to the nut 🥜?

"Where do you live?"

What do you call a cow that doesn't produce any milk? An udder failure.

What's the difference between a plane and a woman?

At least the plane doesn't give you herpes when it crashes at your place.

Are you an egg, because you crack me up?

Why did C.S.C fail the Trig test? Cosecant remember his own name! Mwahahahahahahahahahahahaha!

Yo Father, don't use the baptism bath. I cleaned my anal plug in there.

What?

The holy water gets all the ass off. Don't mind the white stuff. *clears throat*

What’s the worst part of being a pedophile?

Getting the blood out of your clown suit.

What did the racist CoD player say to yo mama?

132.513.531.332

Hey, did you know Paul Walker's gay?

Why do you say that?

Because he likes to wrap himself around long, old wood.

What do you call a prostitute with a runny nose?

Full.

Dude, has anyone made a joke about small foreheads? Oh wait... they would be nonexistent.

Your forehead is like my dad.

Non-existent.

My mom said she will slam my head into my computer if I don't get off it, but I'm not too worried. I think she is joking.

Your hairline is so bad, when you look in the mirror, your hairline looks like an endangered species.

What did the salad dressing say to the tomato?

"Don't look! I'm dressing!"

Why did the toilet paper cross the road?

To get to the rear end.

Why did Hitler die? He got hit by 'ler'.

I read a story about a rabbit being raised. It was a hare-raising tale!