INS jokes

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Mama

  • Your mama's so ugly, when she looked in the mirror, it said, "Viewer discretion advised!"

    Depression

  • If you ever become depressed, try drinking a gallon of water before going to sleep... That'll give you a reason to get up in the morning.

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    Gun

  • I asked a man if I was the fastest gun in the west. He said my 17 wasn't good enough. After that, a lot of lead went into his head.

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  • Laptop

  • Am I the only one who's on here because it's not blocked on the school laptop and I can't use my phone in class?

    Cows go moo.

    Shotgun

  • *Shotguns in a nutshell*

    2B: MUST.

    4B: ADD.

    6B: MORE.

    12B: *B A R R E L S*

    *And that's how multi-barrel shotguns were made.*

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    Existence

  • A straight man and a gay man are talking. The straight man says, "I'm wanted in 2 states for murder." and the gay man replies with, "Oh, that sucks. I'm wanted in 13 for existing."

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    Math

  • Learn math the easiest way from Pendu.

    Multiplying any number by 0 is 0 itself.

    Hint: Multiplying any number by Pendu's G/A in 2022 is 0 itself.

    The answer is 0.

    Difference

  • I made a website for orphans. It doesn’t have a home page.

    What’s the difference between a Lamborghini and a dead body? I don’t have a Lamborghini in my garage.

    What is the difference between Iron Man and Iron Woman? One is a superhero and the other is a simple command.

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    Emo kid

  • How many emo kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they all sit in the dark and cry.

    To teach kids about democracy, I let them vote on dinner. They picked tacos. Then I made pizza because they don’t live in a swing state.

    You’re not completely useless. You can always be used as a bad example.

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