INS jokes

Condom

8 views ·

Mom: Son, where are my condoms?

Son: What are condoms?

Dad: She puts it on me and the sandwich.

Son: Wait, why did my girlfriend come over and take one?

Dad: Um, I don't know, but go to bed.

Son: But it's 2:46pm in the afternoon, bruh.

Dad

1 view ·

Yo, dad is so stupid, he brought the milk after two years, and he said, "Oh, sorry son. I'm going back to the store. Bye."

Makeup

Women be like I don't wear makeup for men.

Then get mad when a man doesn't compliment her in her makeup!

Orphan

14 views ·

Want to know what I do in my freetime?

Punch an orphan, cuz what are they going to do, tell their mom?

Rape

36 views ·

How do you get your appeal for rape charges accepted? Say you were expressing your desire for a woman, which is protected under the Constitution in freedom of expression.

Grandpa

43 views ·

I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandpa, not screaming in terror like all the passengers on the plane he was flying.

Ejaculation

15 views ·

Q: Why doesn’t Jimmy Swaggart worry about his premature ejaculation problem?

A: He believes in the second cumming.

Period

2 views ·

Period: Guess who’s back... back again...

Me: Ugh, can we not do this today?

Period: I can come back in 9 months?

Me: Keep fucking singing.

Man

4 views ·

What does a blind man and your dick have in common?

They both can’t get up without a dog.

Heart

25 views ·

Despite my devilish attitude, I have the heart of a small boy.

I keep it in a jar on my desk.