Girlfriend

Emotionless husk

I showed my girlfriend my shotgun yesterday. It really blew her away.

3

Bar

Your dad

A man walks into a bar, he takes a seat and asks the barmen if he wanted to hear a blonde joke, the barmen replies before you tell this joke I want to tell you something, see the women over there, she is a black belt in karate, she’s blonde , see the bouncer over there he is also a blonde, see the chick over there with that pool que she is also blonde, also I have a shotgun behind the bar i’m blonde, so do you still want to tell your joke? He replies f**k that I ain’t explaining the joke 4 times.

7

Teacher

Anonymous

My teacher told me, “You have no idea how powerful this quote is.” I looked at her and told her, “You don’t know how powerful the shotgun in my bookbag is.”

0

Blonde

savage redneck

what does a blondie and a shotgun have in common? give them a cock and there ready to blow.

America

CheetoBandito

Gun control in America is perfect the way it is, because the other day my daughter was seeing a boy and i caught them in bed. Then i pulled out my shotgun and nearly shot him. As he was running away I shouted " The only person allowed to f*ck my daughter is me!".

2

Aboriginal

Anonymous

What do you call an abo with a shotgun? Sir.

Duck

USSR Soldier

Me and my friend were hunting ducks. He had a 12 gague shotgun, and he looked over and I had a .50 caliber machine gun, he said “your crazy!”, I responded “quackers”

Red

Richard

True Story of Little Red Riding Hood The big bad wolf told Red Riding Hood to strip. He looled at her pussy and said "Now I will fuck you! " Red pulled-out a shotgun from umder her coat and said “Oh no you"re not. You’re not, you’re going to eat me just like it says in the book!”

Blood

bigpapi

Johnny had 55 pineapples. He threw three at his friend. How many does he have now?

None because he was pistol whipped then shot at point blank range with a sawed off shotgun covered in fluoroantimonic acid which burned a hole in his skull causing his brain to melt and rupture nerve cells all over his friends. Then his arms and legs were stuffed into a wheat thresher which was used to harvest the meat of the enslaved children. Then his corpse was molested.

6

Gun

menemajeff

why dose Kurt Cobain hate his brother? because he’s always calling shotgun.

Poor

[Credit to "Trentarium"]

The other day, I donated my car keys, $1,000, and a passport to a homeless man. You could feel the happiness come from me after he holstered his suppressed shotgun.

Fire

FunnyDudeEthan

Your dick is like a shotgun, one cock and your ready to fire.

Paint

Anonymous

What does it take to paint a wall red?

Kurt Cobain and his shotgun.

Blow

Allan C.

Clear all your debts with one easy payment. Buy a shotgun and blow your head off.

Make

Yeetus

How can you make an Otter Pop become funny. Take your shotgun and make an otter go “pop”!