INS jokes
Q. What do you call a hooker in a vegetative state? A. A thot incapable of thought.
Why do vegans hate sex?
They don't want to say they had a meat in 'em.
What do peanut butter and a prostitute's legs have in common?
They’re both easy to spread.
What kind of paper towel do they use in special education classrooms?
Downey.
What do teenage girls and happy meals have in common?
They both come with a toy.
What does a rubix cube and a dick have in common?
The more you play with them the harder they get.
What do Somalians excel at in the United States?
Welfare Fraud
What does Marine stand for?
My Ass Rides In Navy Equipment
Q: What kind of paper towel do they use in special education classrooms?
A: Downey.
Why did a cop in the 1960s cross the road?
To arrest a faggot for cross dressing.
Why are modern women trash?
Because back in the day a woman knew her place.
The next woman who says she'd rather be alone in the woods with a bear, I'm throwing her in a pit with a bear and making her fight it with a wooden sword while drinking and singing "The Bear and the Maiden Fair."
What do women and appliances have in common?
If they don't work, hit them until they work.
R.I.P. on a tombstone normally means "Rest In Peace"; however, in Madeleine McCann's case, it means "Raped In Portugal".
What are wheelchair users experts at?
Being lazy.
A Chinese man and an Indian man are in a car. Who’s driving?
The driving instructor.
When you're asked to tell a crazy story, but the first thing that comes up to your mind is a suicide attempt:
"Oh, I don't remember anything in particular. 😅😀"
A Chinese man and an Indian man are in a car. Who’s driving?
A woman.
What do a man and a blonde do in bed?
Sleep!
What does Kurt have in common with painters?
They paint walls.