Ill jokes

Today I'm attaching a light to the ceiling, but I'm afraid I'll probably screw it up.

I've got a job defusing landmines.

It's difficult, but hopefully soon I'll find my feet.

Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one says: "I'll have some H2O."

The second one says: "I'll have some H2O, too." And then he died.

My hair goes just onto my collar bones. WOW! That's longer than I'll live.

You go h dichotomy lol what do you want to what what’s the name for the address for sure what’s what I name it says I name it lol I don’t o I have to get r CB n nu set set e Okay okay I’ll be at my place.

Hope the towers are doing well this morning, and I'll get back to you!

I'll never forget my grampa's last words, "Stop shaking the ladder, you cunt!"

I’ll never forget my dad’s last words. “Erase my search history, son.”

A dog walked into a tavern and said, "I can't see a thing. I'll open this one."

The humor of it is probably related to the Sumer way of life (and has been lost), but the words remain.

A dog walked into a tavern and said, “I can’t see a thing. I’ll open this one.” The humor of it is probably related to the Sumer way of life (and has been lost), but the words remain.

I'll start: Monokuma.

My dad said he'd get the milk, but he forgot I was in his car.

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

IBC.

IBC who?

I'll be seeing you later.

How on God's green earth does my boyfriend have a phone?

JK WE NEED TO TALK ILL TYPE THE SECRET CODE (YOU'LL KNOW WHAT IT MEANS.) GREEN PUSSY CAT LIKES BANNANS.

I'll give you an A because you're awesome.

B because you're beautiful.

A C because you're caring.

And I'll give you this D cuz you deserve it.

What did the hat say to the tie?

"I'll go on ahead, while you just hang around!"

When I went to see the doctor, he remarked that he hadn't seen me in a while.

I said that I have been ill.

Roses are red, I like weed,

If you say yes then I'll do a "good deed."

I'll never forget my grandpa's last words:

"You need to park a little closer."

When I die, I'll let everyone I kept dear lower my coffin into the ground.

So they can let me down one last time.