By using this site, you agree to its use of cookies. Read more

What do you call a blonde who dyes her hair?

Artifical Intelligence

the doctor says to the woman there was good and bad news. the woman says she wants the bad news first the doctor says the bad news is the baby had red hair. then he said the good news is it is dead.

How does the man on the moon cut his hair? Eclipes it!

I went to the National Redhead Meeting yesterday. Not a soul in sight.

A husband and a wife have four children the oldest three are tall with blonde hair, the youngest is short with brown hair. The husband was on his deathbed and said “honey, can you be completely honest with me, is our youngest son mine?” The wife says “I swear to all that is holy he is your son.” Then the husband died and the wife muttered, “thank god he didn’t ask about the other three.”

Where did the sheep get a hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.

Friend: Why did you touch me? Me: That guy in the corner with no hair , glasses, really nice, white button up shirt, that drives a white van slow by school zones told me to and he would give me hard candy.

How do you get bubblegum out of your hair?

Cancer.

A blond haired girl, a brown haired girl, and a ginger haired girl were out walking when the came across some tracks The brown haired girl looked at them and said, "I think they are elephant tracks." Then the ginger haired girl looked at the tracks and said, "No way they are definitely duck tracks." Finally the blond haired girl bent down to examine the tracks when she got hit by the train.

My friend got a sorry excuse for a new hair style, she says "How do you like my new hair style?" Me: I think it’s a great idea, when are you getting one?

What do you call Trump with no spray tan on his hair?

Your next door grumpy old neighbor.

What happens when you have a kid with Torrets and a hair trigger? The Las Vegas shooting

What’s the difference between Spongebob and a feminist? A feminist has hair.

How do you get gum out of your hair?

Cancer.

How does the moon cut his hair…Eclipse it!!!

After a long labour, a doctor approaches the new mother and says, “Ma’am, I’ve got some good news, and some bad news. What would you like?” After quickly thinking it over, she responds, “I’ll have the bad news first doctor”.

The doctor replies, “Well, I’m not sure how to put this, and I’m sorry to have to tell you, your child has red hair”.

Relieved, a smile spreads across the mother face. “Doctor, if that’s the bad news, what’s the good news”. The doctor replies, “He’s dead”.

So there are these 3 strings, they walk into a bar. People are giving them looks. The small chap is your typical thin cord. He walks to the barman and asks for a rum and coke. He replies, “Oii, your kind ain’t welcomed here so take your drink, mates and f... off.” He goes back to his mates and says, “We’d better get outta here.” “Nonsense.” replies the mid guy, he’s your typical string. Goes to the barman and same story. Finally the last guy, He’s your typical rope. He burst out, “F... this!”. He twits and ties himself whilst messing up his hair. He struts up to the barman and asks for a rum and coke. The barman does so and whilst he prepares the drink he opens with, “Say aren’t you a string?” “No, I’m a frayed knot.”

I like women how I like my hair dryer, locked in a closet most of the time, and only being used to blow me dry

Donald Trump announced he will run for prez today. His hair will on Friday.

why couldn’t the girl brush her hair?

… she had cancer… ;)