Humor
Why does Lincoln like Ronnie Anne?
She is the only one that calls me "lamo."
The pterodactyl went in my bathroom and peed.
When I was in the shower, I couldn't hear it. Why? Because the "p" is silent.
One time there was a depressed man standing in the middle of a train track. A girl said, "Excuse me, can you move, please? I'm trying-" Then the man stopped her sentence and said, "How is your t-shirt so clean?" Then she said back, "Easy, hung it up."
How do you call a cute door?
A-door-able.
An orphanage is like a horse rescue: you rescue them, you rehabilitate them, and then you sell them to the highest bidder.
Memes
Mr. Smith lived in an apartment. In the apartment, he went to the elevator and went to the 16th floor. Then he went to the 21st floor by 5 stairs every morning. Why did he do that?
Because he was too short! So he pressed the highest button he could and walked to his apartment.
The F in "I'm orphan" stands for family.
But there is no F.
What do you call a shoe made out of a banana?
A slipper.
I'm not saying you're stupid.
But you're the reason plastic bags come with the warning, "Do not place over head!"
On the first day of school, the teacher asked a student, "What are your parent's names?"
The student replied, "My father's name is Laughing and my mother's name is Smiling."
The teacher said, "Are you kidding?"
The student said, "No, Kidding is my brother, I am Joking."
What is a paedo's favourite time of year?
Halloween because they get free delivery.
Why are the Twin Towers mad?
They ordered pepperoni pizza, but all they got was plane.
Hi everyone, today I am taking requests for anything you want me to say.
Wanna hear two short jokes and one long one?
joke, joke, jooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooke.
What's the difference between a paralyzed kid and a father?
The father gets to leave, while the kid stays.
Why did the can crusher quit his job? Because it was soda pressing!
What gets hard when tugged and fits perfectly in between boobs... A seatbelt.
Guys, depression cannot be turned into a joke.
Why are people disappointments? Because you are reading this.
kiibati orojo?