Humor
On the first day of school, the teacher asked a student, "What are your parent's names?"
The student replied, "My father's name is Laughing and my mother's name is Smiling."
The teacher said, "Are you kidding?"
The student said, "No, Kidding is my brother, I am Joking."
Why does this website have a home page? It's an orphan joke waiting to happen.
The pterodactyl went in my bathroom and peed.
When I was in the shower, I couldn't hear it. Why? Because the "p" is silent.
One time there was a depressed man standing in the middle of a train track. A girl said, "Excuse me, can you move, please? I'm trying-" Then the man stopped her sentence and said, "How is your t-shirt so clean?" Then she said back, "Easy, hung it up."
What do you call a swimming terrorist? A bath bomb.
An orphanage is like a horse rescue: you rescue them, you rehabilitate them, and then you sell them to the highest bidder.
Why does Lincoln like Ronnie Anne?
She is the only one that calls me "lamo."
What is a paedo's favourite time of year?
Halloween because they get free delivery.
I did a ton of work, a skele-ton.
What's the one upside to being an orphan?
You never have to worry about your jokes being family friendly.
Time flies like an arrow, fruit flies like an apple.
What do you call a fly with no wings?
A walk.
There are times I miss you, that I wish I could remember where I hid your body.
What did the orange say to the other orange?
I orange you glad!
It's getting near midnight, and I can already hear Big Ben. He's upstairs pumping the wife.
What do you call the mushy stuff between sharks' teeth?
A slow swimmer...
An action hero stops a man running by throwing a tire at him.
What is his one liner? "I told you to stop running or you will get tired."
What do you call a dinosaur with a cowboy hat and cowboy boots?
A Tyrannosaurus Tex.
Soldiers, there is one thing you can be sure of: You will be at home with your families, in a jar on the mantelpiece.
What did the cactus look like with his tuxedo on?
Sharp! 🤣