Humor
Falco: Dreaming of a day when I don’t hear people say I’m a knockoff Fox, knockoff Fox.
Fox: Dreaming of a day when you die in a fire and I get all your aerial skills.
Falco: Wat...
What do you call a bus full of transgender men? T-Mobile.
How do you tell whether you’ve satisfied a redhead?
She unlocks the handcuffs.
Did you hear about the dyslexic American police officer?
He shot a Ginger.
What do slinkies and the handicapped have in common?
They are the most fun when pushed down a flight of stairs.
A conman, a mentally handicapped person, and a Russian spy walk into a bar.
And the bartender asks, "What will it be, Mr. President?"
What's the hardest thing when working with the severely mentally handicapped?
My dick.
If a deaf kid swears in sign language, does his mom wash his hands with soap?
I told one of my friends, "You're the reason why gene pools have lifeguards."
If you are fat and transgender, then would you be considered trans fat?
First bite: Oh my God!
Second bite: Oh my, God!
Mickey Mouse is speaking with a divorce attorney...
...and the attorney says, "I'm sorry Mickey, I've gone over all of Minnie's medical history and I find no evidence of mental illness."
To which Mickey replies, "I didn't say she's crazy! I said she's fucking Goofy!"
What's the difference between sex and mental illness?
Most of Reddit has experienced mental illness.
If a mentally challenged person shows up late,
Is it ok to call him tardy?
What do you call a nun on a wheelchair?
Virgin Mobile.
My sister said to roast her, but my mom said I'm not allowed to burn trash.
LBB- me and Shrek built a theme park for you mummy and it’s called Dummy pee pee poo poo doo doo land because Shrek likes to poop.
Shrek- Should I pull the trap?
*LBB’s mom walks into the trap*
LBB and Shrek- surprise we’re mailing you to Peepoo Peepoo AB
Little Brown Bear (LBB): Why did Santa take the kitty and all of my toys, Mummy?
His mom: Maybe because you're the second most massive shit stain besides Caillou.
*Krampus comes down the chimney to eat LBB*
Krampus: Should’ve been better, Little Bear.
LBB: Help, Mummy! He’s the Scratchy monster!
Shrek: Just kidding, it’s not Krampus, but indeed me and Black Donkey instead, and we’re going to poop on your floor.
Duggie: Hopefully Marvin doesn’t see us, and by the way, want some purplish Kool-Aid?
Roses are red, violets are blue, you have a big forehead, and your hairline recedes too.
Roses are red. Violets are blue. Sugar is sweet. And your mom is, too.