House jokes
What TV series do orphans hate?
"House, M.D."
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Leaf. “Leaf” who? Leaf my house, or else you will regret it. You don’t live here, you dumb idiot! ?!
What do you call a door that bells? A doorbell.
During Halloween, my friend went as a skeleton.
He refused to go into the haunted house. Looks like he was SPINE-LESS.
Why did the cop ask the orphan if he was home alone?
The orphan said because my parents have never come back yet because I have none.
Why are orphans so bad at poker?
They don't know what a full house is.
I put this joke so the amount of jokes will be 69. Also, I have 50 kids in my basement. I fed "Twinkies" last night.
When you fall asleep on the couch and wake up in your bed.
But you know you live alone.
So I went to my friend's house and he told me to make myself at home, so I kicked him out. I don't like visitors.
Why did the panda cross the road to get to the bamboo house?
What happens when there's ten people in one house and they all have to shit and there's one bathroom?
It's a motherfucking shitshow party!
"Batteries, batteries, who the batteries in your remotes and everything else you got in your house is turned upside down?"
What do a brand new house, me, and new jewelry box have in common?
We're all empty on the inside.
When you ask an orphan to come over:
Kid: "Do you want to come over to my house?"
Orphan: "Yeah, sure."
Kid: "Ok, ask your parents—oh wait."
There’s a one-story house in which everything is yellow. Yellow walls, yellow doors, yellow furniture. What color are the stairs?
Answer: There aren’t any—it’s a one-story house.
What does a house wear? Address.
Why couldn't the carrot go to his friend's house?
Because he was grounded.
Mary has a house near a forest. She lives with her bro, and she once asked, "How many trees are there?" Her bro said: "I don't know." She said: "Tree."
*Ring Ring!*
Who’s there?
Soldier!
Soldier who?
You’ve soldier house! Congrats!
waHt
How is a marriage like a hurricane?
In the beginning, there’s a lot of sucking and blowing, but at the end, you lose your house.