Corner jokes
There were once three brothers, Shit, Shut up, and Manners. One day, Shit got hit by a car. Shut up went to find help at the local police station while Manners tried to help Shit.
When Shut up got to the police station he says, "My brother has just been hit by a car."
The policeman replied with, "OK then, first I need to know your name."
"Shut up."
"No, I need to know your name."
"Shut up."
"Excuse me, but where are your manners?"
"Round the corner picking up shit."
What's red and in a corner?
A baby with a razor blade.
What's green and in a corner?
The same baby three weeks later.
Q: Why was the leper hockey game cancelled?
A: There was a face off in the corner.
Why don't Pakis play football? Every time they get a corner, they build a shop.
How do you confuse a fish? Put it in a round fishbowl and tell it to go to the corner!
If your house is cold, just stand in the corner. It's always 90 degrees there.
A man was walking home but felt tired, so took a short cut through the cemetery. He then heard a tap, tap, then out of the corner of his eye, he saw a man with a hammer hitting the tombstone. The man said, "You scared me. I thought you were a ghost." The other person mumbled, "They spelled my name wrong."
1. You're so dumb, you think Cheerios are donut seeds!
2. You're so fat, you could sell shade!
3. You're just like coconut water, nobody likes you!
4. Have you been shopping lately? Because they're selling lives around the corner, you should go get one!
If being ugly was a crime, you would get a life sentence!!
Are these good?
Me: Hey Joe, updog.
Joe: What?
Me: Updog.
Joe: What's updog?
*Facepalms*
Me: Lol in the corner.
Why can’t the disabled kid live on the corner?
Because he’s disabled.
If you take your dog for a walk and you BOTH use the fire hydrant down at the corner...you might be a Redneck!
What is blue and sits in a corner? A baby in a baggy.
Why are Indian people bad at Monopoly?
Because whenever they hit the corner, they build a shop.
You can't send an Indian to walk a corner. The only corner they will get to is 7-11.
I apologize if those jokes didn't meet your expectations. Humor can be subjective, and different people have different tastes when it comes to jokes. I'll try my best to share a few more jokes with you:
Why don't scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!
What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta!
Why don't skeletons fight each other? They don't have the guts!
What did one hat say to the other hat? You stay here, I'll go on ahead!
Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together!
Why don't seagulls fly over the bay? Because then they'd be called bagels!
What did one wall say to the other wall? I'll meet you at the corner!
Why don't eggs tell jokes? They might crack up!
What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!
I hope these bring a bit more amusement. Let me know if there's anything else I can assist you with!
How do you confuse a blonde?
Tell them to stand in the corner in a round room.
What's the definition of rude?
Sticking a blind man in a corner and telling him to find his wife.
Friend: Why did you touch me?
Me: That guy in the corner with no hair, glasses, really nice, white button up shirt, that drives a white van slow by school zones told me to and he would give me hard candy.
When prostitutes misbehave, do their pimps make them stand out on the corner with a "For Rent" sign on their crotch?
Why are corners so hot?
They are always 90 degrees.