History jokes
My parents are like the Twin Towers, only one came back.
Why is the Tower of Pisa tilted?
Because it had more reflects than the Twin Towers.
Nothing bad ever happens to the Kennedys! Except that one headshot, but we don’t talk about that.
I love climbing over walls because my ancestry was Mexican.
Q: What does a microwave and an M1 Garand have in common?
A: They both go “ping” when they’re done.
The second twin tower is like Canada. It doesn’t exist.
Ever notice 9-1-1 (the number for the po-po) is the Great Date (9-11)... Hmmm.
Why are there no fat people in Japan?
Last time they had a "Fat Man," 80,000 people died.
So the other day my black friend and I were working on a group project. He was so slow so I whipped him to make him faster.
Twin Towers are like genders, there used to be 2.
Iran: We can beat the USA.
Japan: You do realize we beat him in Battleship, and he dropped the sun on us.
Iran: So?
Japan: Twice!
Why can't dinosaurs clap?
'Cause they're dead.
Why were the people in the Twin Towers upset? They ordered pepperoni pizza, but instead they got plane.
What is the one sauce Germans avoid on their steak?
"Ajous".
If I was in a room with Khalid Sheikh Mohammed, Hitler, and my greatest enemy, I would pour out the bullets and beat my enemy with the gun.
What do you call a bullet head?
JFK.
Why can't a dinosaur clap? Because it's dead.
In the morning at 6:30 AM,
Teacher: Who fought in World War I?
Me: Trump & Biden.
Teacher: Oh ok... well good job class, see you tomorrow and study your books.
After school,
Teacher: Oh God those kids know nothing.
"She looks at her clock."
Teacher: And now I am sewed.
Why are Americans bad at Clash Royale?
Because they have already lost 2 towers.
What do Black people and chains have in common? Both work better with chains on them?