History jokes
What’s worse than dropping your ice cream?
The Holocaust.
Hitler walked so Kim can run.
What does Kobe and the Twin Towers have in common?
The pilots just couldn't stick the landing.
Wow, that was explosive!
Man, I'm on fire 🔥 today!
Little Johnny was sitting in class, and he was behind a girl called Sally. The teacher asks the class, “Who created the Earth?” And Little Johnny pokes Sally in the back with his sharpened pencil, and she jumps and says, “MY GOD!” And the teacher says, “Yes, Sally, God did create the Earth.” Sally sits down.
Then, the teacher asks, “Where do you go after you live a good life?” and Little Johnny pokes Sally again, and she jumps up and says, “HEAVENS TO BETSY!” And the teacher says, “Yes Sally. You will go to heaven after you live a good life.” Sally sits down, knowing full well Little Johnny was poking her. Sally gave Little Johnny an angry glare, and she turns around.
And then, the teacher asks the class, “What did Eve say to Adam after their 77th child?” and Little Johnny pokes Sally HARDER this time in the back, and Sally jumps, turns around, and says, “If you stick that thing in me one more time, I swear I’m gonna lose it!” And the teacher faints.
Why does Jesus never vacation on Earth?
Because he traveled down about 2,000 years ago, got with some Jewish chick, and they're still talking about it!
What would Martin Luther King Jr. be if he was white?
Alive.
9/11
Children in the Twin Towers be like: "Look, Mum, it's a plane!"
Why did the Romans build straight roads? So the Pakis (bastards) didn't build corner shops.
Me and my friend were cranking 90s in Fortnite, then our other friend joined, started flying a plane. We died like all the people in 9/11.
It's a tower.
No, it's a plane.
Me: Nope, it's 9/11.
How did Helen Keller die?
Her ex gave her plutonium and told her to eat it.
What was the last pizza order at the World Trade Center?
Two large planes.
I'd tell you a 9/11 joke, but it'd fly over your head and into the Twin Towers.
Why is the Pentagon mad?
Because it didn't get two pizzas, but only one plane pizza.
Why are Americans bad at chess? Because they lost two towers.
Why are Americans so bad at chess? Because they already lost two towers.
If only Caesar hadn’t left home that day...
Why can't Americans trade with other countries? We lost the trading center!
Knight HAHAHAHA!