An American woman married a British man. On their honeymoon, the British husband said, ̈You look like a million pounds! ̈ The wife divorced him.
What's the difference between England’s football team and a tea bag?
The tea bag stays in the cup longer.
An American is lecturing a British person, saying things like "it's an elevator not a lift" and "it's chips not crisps" etc. After a while of this the British person calmly retorted "they're schools, not shooting ranges".
next time u see a Brit, go up to them and say:
Imagine losing a 'Tea Party in Boston'
Wonder why the British are so good at chess? They have the queen.
Wonder why Americans are so bad at chess? They lost two towers.
How did the British lose the war of 1812
They were out Britshed
In communist Russia there is no discrimination. White, black, African, American, British and Asian. They all go to Gulag eventually
The British equivalent to 9/11 would be a big red bus crashing into Big Ben
Americans when they think they have the best offensive British jokes: we threw your tea in the ocean. 💀
British people making offensive jokes about America: our towers didn’t explode.😎
Asians love it when a british person says "Rice"!
Why should you keep English gay activists away from neo-nazis?
British cigarettes get smoked easily.
why do they put barcodes on the ships in norway why? so when they come into port they can scan-de-navian
In British chess I guess they play without a queen...
But in American chess they play without 2 towers
why cant british people play chess
because they lost their queen
Americans: we drive on the right side of the road
The British: we drive on the left side of the road
Russia: ROAD IS ROAD *crashing noises follow*
whats the difference between the queens death and princess Diana death? the queen died in peace not pieces
What’s the difference between a cancer patient and British news reporter in south They usually don’t live to tell the tale
Only one band is capable of affording the insurance on supercars. UB40!
American people: We will throw your teabags in the ocean! British: At least our towers didn’t fall😎
The American salute start's with your hand being facing flat towards the ground on your head. The British salute starts with your hand against your head just like the American Salute. The French salute starts your hands in the air. The Saudi salute starts with you being bent over with a camel tongue in your ass.
