Why can’t Germans call a taxi? *does taxi calling motion*
Dear Victims... äh Passengers, we are flying now from Ryadh to New York. Amazing Building... äh Amazing City. There's online, but 2000 there were two Towers... äh Restaurants. We hijack the plane... äh Hi Jack. Jack is my co-pilot, and I said hello. Don‘t scream... History Repea... äh... History never comes back, we are now flying back to the Airport. 💀
How did Teddy Roosevelt swing all the ladies?
He spoke softly and carried a big stick.
Q: What do you call 9/11? A: Enemy persion airstrike.
Yo mama so fat and old, she is the reason the Great Depression happened.
Why did Princess Diana cross the road?
She wasn’t wearing a seat belt.
What do Rubik's cubes and melons have in common?
They have a history of separating colors.
Who ended Franz Ferdinand's COD account?
He ended with a Black Handed bang.
What was the last thing that went through PH's head?
Water and smoke.
AR-15: Who are you?
Musket: I'm you, but from another timeline.
Heil Kyle!
What comes after 611? 711.
What comes after that? 811.
What comes after that? George W. Bush.
What's Bin Laden's favorite flavor of crisp? Plain.
Dodo.
The greatest playwright in history found he couldn’t use lances. He could only use "Shake-spears."
I don't usually like to tell 9/11 jokes for two reasons: they're morally wrong, and they tend to crash and burn.
Whenever you think back to 9/11 and realize there are 12 hours in front of us, why the f*ck didn't they warn us?
Bessie Coleman - I don't want to be a flier cause I am African American.
What do you get when you cross an adopted kid with a river?
Moses hits the adoption lottery!
How do you communicate to the dead?
Jump up and down on the ground and speak in Morse code!
