Height jokes
Some marriages can make short people look like Shaquille O'Neal.
You’re so short, you must need a ladder to reach your advice and dreams.
Why did the short person become a chef?
Because they could "microwave" dinner without needing a stool!
I'm 5'6", and my mom is 5'1" and 1/2. She always says she's going to get a suicide vest and fill it with bricks and squish me. I tell her good luck.
And when she tries to hug me, she says, "You're too fucking tall, kid," so I usually reply with "Go get a stool then."
Why did the short person bring a ladder to the bar?
Because they heard the drinks were on the house!
Memes
Gently throw a baby off a ten story building!
My friend said not to look down on me. I said I can't because I'm shorter than her.
What did the janitor think when he was mopping the 101st floor?
The 102nd.
How many midgets does it take to change a lightbulb?
Three, because it’s the normal person's height.
Women be like, "Men's heights," then cry when they get called fat...
What do you call a dark, average height Punjabi male?
Josiah.
I would make a joke about short people, but they probably couldn't hear it.
Why do midgets laugh when they run?
The grass tickles their balls.
Yo mama so tall, she eats paramedics.
Why are short people sad?
Don't judge though, it's crap but...
Because they couldn't reach happiness.
Imagine me being 12 feet taller than your dad.
It's gonna take a step stool to get a blow job.
You're so short that you don't have to open the front door to get inside the house.
You're so short that you use a ladder to reach the potato chips!
You’re so short, you could sweep under your bed while standing.