Some marriages can make short people look like Shaquille O'Neal.
How is the weather down there?
Women be like, "Men's heights," then cry when they get called fat...
You're so short that you don't have to open the front door to get inside the house.
You're so short that you use a ladder to reach the potato chips!
You’re so short, you could sweep under your bed while standing.
You’re so short, you can swing your legs when you sit on a stool.
It's gonna take a step stool to get a blow job.
Why are short people sad?
Don't judge though, it's crap but...
Because they couldn't reach happiness.
Imagine me being 12 feet taller than your dad.
How many midgets does it take to change a lightbulb?
Three, because it’s the normal person's height.
What do you call a dark, average height Punjabi male?
Josiah.
I'm 5'6", and my mom is 5'1" and 1/2. She always says she's going to get a suicide vest and fill it with bricks and squish me. I tell her good luck.
And when she tries to hug me, she says, "You're too fucking tall, kid," so I usually reply with "Go get a stool then."
My friend said not to look down on me. I said I can't because I'm shorter than her.
Gently throw a baby off a ten story building!
I would make a joke about short people, but they probably couldn't hear it.
What did the janitor think when he was mopping the 101st floor?
The 102nd.
Why did the short person bring a ladder to the bar?
Because they heard the drinks were on the house!
Why did the short person become a chef?
Because they could "microwave" dinner without needing a stool!
My friend said she wanted to fly, so I pushed her off a building.
