Health jokes

What do you call cancers? Loyal, protective, and caring.

Why did the cucumber go to the doctor? Because he wasn't peeling well!

Why did the orange stop? Because it ran out of juice.

A penis is driving a car when all of a sudden it gets hit by a car, what did the penis end up saying?

Aaaawwwww I got dicklash!

Time for you to stop looking at jokes on worstjokesever.com and go to bed!

I love riding my bike 🚲.

What do you call a bloody pig?

HAMorrhage!

Sarcastic Doctor: Tell me.

Guy: I have leukemia in the brain.

Sarcastic Doctor: That doesn't concern me.

Yo mama so stupid, she made an appointment with Dr. Pepper.

What's the worst part about eating a vegetable?

The wheelchair.

My brother Taf likes to pee the bed.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Everything is black, I can't see, can you?

A child with cancer says, "Mother, what will I be when I grow up?"

Then the mother says, "Shut up, dick, you have cancer!" Hehehe.

What's the difference between anal and oral?

Oral makes your day whereas anal makes your whole weak.

I had a glass of Schweppes lemonade in one hand and a glass of R. Whites in the other. I got into a hot sweat. I think I have Corona Virus.

I did a good walk and I...

What did the doc say to the skeleton? You're skele-a-ton.

I bought these trainers from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced it with, but I have been trippin' all day.

Why did the person peel his skin off? Because he wanted to.

What’s the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?

The wheelchair.