Health jokes
The African kids' theme song is "Staying Alive."
Your hairline is so repulsive that my entire family got eye cancer from seeing it, and it goes so far back that you be looking like Vegeta.
Q: What do you call a cat living with a vet? A: A dead, shrivelled up cat on her death bed that is attached to their owner.
Isn't It Purrfect!
Fuck, my dad has cancer, lol.
When a fat person wants to kill themselves, why are they so worried? The diabetes will get to them sooner or later!
Memes
daily reminder
I'm jealous of cancer. My dad beat me but never beat cancer.
A "type person" is addicted to eating sugar.
When the doctor saw this, he said,
"From Type 2 Diabetes!"
Get it?
Why isn't there a ball pit at Taco Bell? Because it's hard to have fun knowing you might poop your pants.
What does a girl get after having sex with Batman?
Defective rabies.
This is Sally.
Sally says hi.
This is Sally when a car comes by. 🤕
What do you call a duck that is addicted to drugs?
A quack head!
My mom must be a duck then...
A joke, huh?
My sense of humor.
What itches a lot?
Syphilis.
Do no doctor start with A and A+?
When a man loses his testosterone,
Man: Could I please have a loaner boner?
What do 9/11 and Covid-19 both have in common?
Asians caused them both!
Your mom is so fat she ate an iPad and said, "Ahqah!" funny food mmm banana and hehe haha! And what deal with airline food? It's not white and it's not black and it's not Asian!? AHAH? DSF
My grandpa died to ligma :(
LIGMA BALLS!
My cousin is a surgeon.
Last year he botched a surgery he was doing on a patient who happened to be gay. He's being sued for malpractice for turning a fruit into a vegetable.
Q. What do you call a rich person who is in a vegetative state?
A. A loaded potato.