What’s worse than a girl getting a period?
A boy getting a period.
Health Jokes
Yo mama's so stupid, she went to the dentist to get a Bluetooth.
Yo momma so stupid, when someone got cardiac arrest, she tried to put the person to court, and when the judge said "ORDER AT THE COURT," she thought it's a food court and ordered 20 Big Macs and got a heart attack.
Sally had 9 pounds of boobs (9), which was 2 2 many (922), so on the 9th of the month (9229) at 6pm (92296) on 68 street (922968), she went to doctor x to get 6 operations (922968x6) and left her (flip your calculator) boobless.
You're so skinny the world turns to the left!
I caught the flowers at a wedding--now married to a hot guy. But then I caught an STD at a funeral, I kinda nervo.........
What do you call a retard that got hit by a car? Mashed potatoes.
Doctor: I have bad news.
Man: What?
Doctor: There are two things wrong with you. First, you have cancer.
Man: Oh, no...
Doctor: Second, you have Alzheimer's.
Man: Well, at least I don't have cancer!
Yo mama so fat, her birth certificate was an apology letter.
Doctor: You have cancer.
Patient: Will I survive?
Doctor: Probably not.
Drinking coffee when you're anxious is about as effective as using gasoline to put out a fire, but slurp slurp guess who's an anxious bitch who never learns.
Patient number 14 was diagnosed with stage 4 melanoma—a type of skin cancer. Pretty ironic how he travels. He went to terminal 14.
Me in 2078 when the COVID-19 delta alpha theta beta cya layta alligayta nlgga chungus sussy deef clussy sussy bussy cunnybrap variant comes out and I need to stay in lockdown for another 2 years with my new mandated virus stopper buttplug 9000.
For so long, I thought I was a Gemini, apparently I'm Cancer!
Why does Aaron chug beer on a Wednesday?
Because his dad beats him every single day because he has scoliosis.
Yo momma so fat, when she went for a health consultation, the doc told her to make do with health insurance.
Fe fi foung better run and hide: Covid (really).
When someone calls you, say "Welcome to Joe's Pizza Abortion Clinic, your loss is our sauce."
Why didn't the teddy bear go to the gym?
Because he didn't want to get ripped.
Sometimes I wish I could use my school scissors on my heart.
