Government

Government jokes

Constitution

Thomas Jefferson’s 80th b-day bash be like:

Jackson: "CALHOUN! YOU’RE CHEATING ON ME - IN BED WITH THE CONSTITUTION??"

War

9/10/01

Bush: “Ok, I got this. Just act surprised and pretend to be sad and declare war on Afghanistan.”

President

Imagine if Joe Biden was elected for a second term.

He would be the first president to be assassinated by a slick bathtub.

Trump

Why didn't Trump help someone who can't walk?

He thinks she should stand up for herself.

President

Hillary Clinton could be the first F president ever elected into office.

Sorry, it was supposed to say "Female," but the "emale" got deleted.

Taco Bell

What's the difference between Taco Bell and KFC?

KFC doesn't have Border Patrol agents surrounding all of its buildings right now.

Joe Biden

If Joe Biden was on stage and he heard gunshots, he probably would’ve thought it was the ice cream truck.

Part

Voting is like doing a group project in school.

I did my part, but I’m worried the rest of you are going to fuck this up.

Tower

America get pranked lol.

Biden's penis is probably as big as the Twin Towers right now.

Oh wait...

Mama

Yo' mama is so stupid, when they said, "Order in the court," she asked for fries and a shake.

Mama

Yo mama so fat that when she attempted suicide, she bounced to Area 51.

Alien

An alien goes to Area 51, but I wonder why he doesn't go to your house?

Democrat

Difference

What's the difference between a prostitute and a Democrat? A Democrat will keep screwing you when you run out of money.