Government jokes

In Pharmacology, all drugs have two names. For example, the trade name of Tylenol also has a generic name of Acetaminophen. Aleve is also called Naproxen. Amoxil is also called Amoxicillin and Advil is also called Ibuprofen.

The FDA has been looking for a generic name for Viagra. After careful consideration by a team of government experts, it recently announced that it has settled on the generic name of Mycoxafloppin. Also considered were Mycoxafailin, Midixadrupin, Midixarizin or Dixafix.

Texans: Don't mess with Texas.

*snows 1 inch*

Texans: Please help us, President Biden!

What do you call the United States of America under a Joe Biden presidency?

Answer: The Democratic People’s Socialist States of America. We're still America, just a different kind of America. And that’s no joke. 😔

I was voting for Trump in the 2016 election. It's been a while since the last presidential assassination...

"Everyone knows I love kids better than people."

- Joe Biden. (A.K.A. Pedo Peter.)

How do you spell "cognitive mess?"

J.O.E. B.I.D.E.N.

Joe Biden said he was going to a petting zoo.

Trump said schools are not petting zoos.

There are 4 people on an airplane, and the pilot has a heart attack and dies. The plane is going down, and there are also only 3 parachutes. So the guy who knows how to cure cancer says, "I’m jumping. I can save many lives." Then the 46th president, Joe Biden, says, "I’m taking the 2nd one." So there is only one left. Donald Trump says to the 7-year-old girl, "I have lived a long life. You can take the next one." So the little girl says, "That’s ok; the 46th president took my backpack." Lol.

NASA stands for naughty aliens spewing apricots.

ICE and ISIS have similar first syllables. Coincidence? I think not!

What do you say when Trump is still president during 2020? Magic!

U.S.A: No Queen?

England: No towers?

What did Hitler say to Stan after he died?

I did nazi that coming!

If I ever ran for public office, I'd make Rajan a call center employee again.

Yo mama is so dumb, she sits on Trump's wall 24 hours every day.

What did kings say when they were made king?

Allah ail (All hail) [insert name here]!

"In my opinion, JFK was the best president."

"Why?"

"He was very open-minded!"

My name is Joe Biden, and I am running for US Senate.

Titanic is like our president; it cracks in half and dies.

When you turn 100, you get a letter from the Queen. When you turn 16, you get a DM from Prince Andrew.