Constitution jokes

Hi, I'm Saul Goodman. Did you know that you have rights? The Constitution says you do, and so do I. I believe that until proven guilty, every man, woman, and child in this country is innocent, and that's why I fight for you, Albuquerque!

What's the difference between a gun and a penis?

The American government does not define you as having the constitutional right to a penis.

How do you get your appeal for rape charges accepted? Say you were expressing your desire for a woman, which is protected under the Constitution in freedom of expression.

Bye, I'm Paul Badman. Did you know that you don't have rights? The Articles of Confederation say you don't, and so do I. I believe that until proven innocent, every woman, man, and adult in this country is guilty. And that's why I don't fight for you, Santa Fe!

Thomas Jefferson’s 80th b-day bash be like:

Jackson: "CALHOUN! YOU’RE CHEATING ON ME - IN BED WITH THE CONSTITUTION??"

I can tell why the Founding Fathers adopted the Constitution, because nobody likes it.

What is your favorite amendment? A rapper.

Why didn’t the construction worker build a bridge?

He was scared to get across.

The USA guaranteeing freedom of speech is the biggest joke I've heard... Tell that to the people who were almost killed because their cars had "NASCAR Sucks" and "Country and Western is rubbish" on them!

The only reason why Murrikkkunts think Canada isn't free is because incest is illegal in Canada, in which one can face a sentence as long as 14 years in prison if convicted.

English is weird. It can be understood through tough, thorough thought, though.

Teacher tests Little Johnny, “OK, Johnny, create a sentence which starts with ‘I’.”

Little Johnny confidently starts, “I is...”

Teacher snaps, “No, Little Johnny. You must always say, ‘I am’.”

Little Johnny sighs, “Yes ma’am. ‘I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.’”

A little known rule: You cannot be circumcised if you are running for political office in the US.

You need to be a complete dick.