Government jokes
NASA stands for "Nobody asks scientists anymore."
Some of the most convincing people you'll ever listen to are born liars; usually they're called politicians.
Best political joke... Joe Biden.
What do Japanese men do when they vote?
They have an erection.
Who's the cutest president in the world?
Kim Jong Un, chh💕💕💕
My bro had siblings who survived they could have helped him at any moment and now we have people around with the last name Hitler.
I don't laugh at Trump.
I was taught to NEVER make fun of the mentally handicapped.
EU Delegate: "Sir, your country has the highest corruption and crime rate out of any other member nations. What do you have to say?"
Ambassador: *tries slipping the delegate 40 Euros* "You didn't see any statistics."
Once the old lady told me she had wisdom, but after she voted! 🤯
I have good faith in the glue police. They usually stick to their word.
I'm just here to say that I don't approve of political jokes.
I've seen too many of them get elected.
A boy asks his father:
"What is politics?"
Father answers:
"It’s very simple! You see, I bring in the money, so I’m big business. Your mother spends the money, so she’s the government.
Your grandfather sees to it that everything is managed in an orderly way. So he’s the law.
Our maid is the working class.
Everything revolves around your interests, so you’re the people. Your little baby brother represents the future."
The boy has to think it over. That night he hears his little brother crying due to a dirty diaper. He doesn’t know what to do, so he goes to the bedroom of his parents. There his mother is sound asleep. He goes to the bedroom of the maid, but his father is there fucking the maid — and oddly enough his grandfather is watching through the window.
Nobody notices the boy and he returns to his bed.
The next day his father asks him:
"So, can you now explain to me what politics is?"
The boy says:
"Yes, it’s all become clear to me!
Big business screws over the working class while the law watches and the government sleeps. The people are ignored and the future lies in shit."
Yo mama so fat they faked COVID-19 just to put a mask on her.
JFK and Abraham Lincoln were terrible presidents. It's like their heads were empty.
What did Obama ask Trump?
As the coronavirus pandemic strengthens...
Trump - "Quick, inject yourselves with bleach!"
Also Trump - "I order everyone in America to wear a face mask except for me!"
Joe Biden walks into the White House kitchen.
"Are those brownies I smell?" he asks.
"Indeed, they are," he was told.
"Gee," he says, "they smell nothing like Girl Scouts!"
9/11 happened... right?
The cops respond to 9-1-1... coincidence, I think not.
Joe Biden doesn’t follow his own f**king mask mandate.
NASA equals nugget and sh*t, amateur.
What does NASA mean? No Apes Submit Astronauts.