Get jokes
What happens when a frog's car breaks down?
It gets toad away!
If you got a priest, a Rhodes scholar, and a politician in a room, what would you get?
The Royal Commission.
Alternatively, Tony Abbott.
Your mum is so fat, when I see her, I get depressed.
When the class plays hangman, the emos get inspired!
My friend just told me about reverse exorcisms.
In these, the demon tells the priest to get out of the child.
Yo, barber fucked up so bad he had to get a breathalyzer test.
Every time a Light Saber goes off, it's just a Jedi Master getting hard over a kid. Lol.
Why don’t Asians get stung by bees?
Because they are always expected to get “A’s.”
Your mum is so fat that when you walk around her, you get lost.
The kid in the wheelchair was getting bullied, so I encouraged him to stand up for himself. I don't know why he started crying.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
An apple gets picked.
What kind of cold flu do the Japanese get? The Koflu.
My wife (or husband) told me to get six cans of Sprite from the grocery store.
I had just realized when I got home that I had picked up 7-Up.
Never compare an orphan to an Apple because the Apple always gets picked.
There are perks to bringing an emo to the grocery store; you can get coupons by scanning their wrist.
When someone calls me ugly, I get sad and hug them.
I know life can be difficult for those with weak vision.
An eye for an eye will make the whole world blind...
...but it will allow ugly people to get laid.
Why can orphans travel around so much?
A. They never get homesick.
Q: What do you get when you cross Raggedy Ann with the Pillsbury Dough Boy?
A: A red-headed bitch with a yeast infection.
What’s the difference between a Rubik's cube and a penis? The more you play with it, the harder it gets.