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GIVEAWAAAAAAY!!!

Okay, 19 dollar Fortnite card. Who wants it? And yes, I’m giving it away. Remember: Share, share, share! And trolls: Don’t get BLOCKED!

Why do orphans play GTA 5?

To get wanted!

I told a seal a joke, it went like this: "Why did the kid cross the playground?" He said, "Why?" I said, "To get to the other slide." And then he said, "That's the sealiest thing I've ever heard!"

What happens when you get a virus-related sickness? It goes viral on Twitter!

Roses are red, chocolate is brown,

I expect nothing and still get let down!

How do you knockout an unorthodox blue tooth?

You get a good connection.

What do you get when you cross a vampire and a snowman?

Frostbite.

My dog got mad at me for touching his toy. Do you know what he said?

"Get your paws off!" 💩💩💩

So I saw the police. I yelled, "Dumper, get into the fucking yumper!"

🎨🧑🏻‍🦰 day was that good fun day at home 🏠. I had to the earth and I love it when you get a home and walk walk home from school and walk home and walk walk home from school and walk walk home 🏠. Was your birthday 🎁? I did.

An action hero stops a man running by throwing a tire at him.

What is his one liner? "I told you to stop running or you will get tired."

When you donate a kidney, you are a total hero, everyone loves you.

When you donate five kidneys though, people start yelling, the police gets called--sheesh!

Let's get this right. What's the difference between an egg and a wank?

You can beat an egg, but you can't beat...

Why'd Billy get fired from the banana factory?

He kept throwing with the bent one.

I’d pound your mom so fast, even Sonic would get jealous!

What's the difference between you and an egg?

An egg gets laid.

I asked my mom if I can help her out with the cooking, she answered yes.

A few hours later, dinner was ready and dad came to join. Mother said, "Honey, can you get the mashed potatoes?" Dad said, "Why, she’s right here."

What does Michael Jackson say when he gets hard? Ow!

If I make you breakfast in bed, a simple 'thank you' is all I need.

Not all this 'How did you get in my house?' business.

Dating 101:

Here's what you do:

1. Dinner. 2. Kiss. 3. Movie. 4. Sex. 5. Bring her back home. 6. Get paid 15 bucks for babysitting.