Food jokes
Why do orphans use water for cereal? Cause their dad never came back with the milk.
Someone: PLEASE EAT! I DON'T WANT YOU TO DIE!
Me: *Trying to remember how long it would take me to die of starvation because I've already googled it and given up because it takes too long.*
Me: Na, yeah, I still have 19 days left.
Why can't Asians play baseball?
Because they ate all the bats!
I know an orphan named Zara, and he has never had homemade food.
What is the difference between an orphan and cotton candy?
Answer: The cotton candy gets picked.
Memes
My sis told me that onions are the only food that can make you cry...
So I threw a coconut at her.
Asians love it when a British person says "Rice!"
Asians love it when a British person says "Race!"
What type of flour do orphans use?
- Self-raising.
Who cooks in a lesbian relationship?
Neither one of them, they eat out.
What does a cannibal call a wheelchair user?
Fast food.
What’s something you can say in a grocery store and in bed?
"Thanks for coming."
Q: Why did the trans man only eat salads?
A: Because he is a "herbefore."
Why does an orphan use water for his cereal?
He is waiting for his dad with the milk.
Man: Cow milk is drinkable.
Other man: How do you know that?
Man: *smiles with milk all over mouth*
Other man: John...h-how do you know that!
It turns out a major new study recently found that humans eat more bananas than monkeys. It's true.
I can't remember the last time I ate a monkey.
For some reason, when my mom eats hot dogs, she likes to lick and suck on it first. As a son, can anyone tell me why?
Why is it annoying to eat by basketball players? Because they dribble all the time!
Do you like pudding? Pudding deez nuts in your mouth!
What does an apple and suicidal person have in common?
They're both hanging from a tree.