Food

Food jokes

Apple

TEST QUESTION: what looks like half an apple?

My cousin: the other half.

Cookie

When a cookie πŸͺ wins a race, what will the crowd say?

β€œChip Chip Hooray!”

Onion

What's the difference between an onion and a baby? I only tear up cutting the onion.

Memes

Hot Dog

For some reason, when my mom eats hot dogs, she likes to lick and suck on it first. As a son, can anyone tell me why?

Feminist

I went to a feminist picnic the other day.

It was great, apart from the fact no one made any sandwiches.

Tomato

(There was a mommy tomato, a daddy tomato, and a baby tomato.)

Baby: Wait for me!

(Father tomato walks back toward the baby.)

(He squishes the child.)

Father: Ketchup!

Burrito

What's the difference between a bridge and a burrito?

I can't jump off a burrito.

Wine

How do you know Johnny Depp finished his meal?

When you see fifty empty bottles of wine on his front doorstep.