Food jokes
What type of flour do orphans use?
- Self-raising.
What is the difference between an orphan and cotton candy?
Answer: The cotton candy gets picked.
What does a cannibal call a wheelchair user?
Fast food.
How do you get a black girl to suck your meat?
Put barbecue sauce on it.
Who cooks in a lesbian relationship?
Neither one of them, they eat out.
What’s something you can say in a grocery store and in bed?
"Thanks for coming."
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Because KFC was offering free seeds.
Man: Cow milk is drinkable.
Other man: How do you know that?
Man: *smiles with milk all over mouth*
Other man: John...h-how do you know that!
It turns out a major new study recently found that humans eat more bananas than monkeys. It's true.
I can't remember the last time I ate a monkey.
What do you call a boy Panera Bread?
Panera Balls.
Why do orphans use water for cereal? Cause their dad never came back with the milk.
For some reason, when my mom eats hot dogs, she likes to lick and suck on it first. As a son, can anyone tell me why?
(There was a mommy tomato, a daddy tomato, and a baby tomato.)
Baby: Wait for me!
(Father tomato walks back toward the baby.)
(He squishes the child.)
Father: Ketchup!
Orphans don't like family sized chips, I wonder why.
Come, my children, to the bread cult!
Why does an orphan use water for his cereal?
He is waiting for his dad with the milk.
My wife made electric eel for supper. I was shocked!
Underground Fruit Association of N&C (UGFA)?
We’re bananas!
Dude,
if you stab a cereal box, will that make you a cereal killer?
I went to a feminist picnic the other day.
It was great, apart from the fact no one made any sandwiches.