Food jokes
My eggs are just like my dad... nonegg-istent.
Why did the astronauts take a box of cereal and a cow with them? In case they bypassed the Milky Way!
what do you call a cow that fell?
Ground beef.
I asked my girlfriend what she wanted to eat, she said nothing. So I brought her to Africa.
Skidaddle skidoodle, your dick is now a noodle!
Memes
What's the difference between a baby and an onion?
The baby cries when I cut it, but an onion makes me cry when I cut it.
So, I know that there are a lot of egg yolks on this website, and I guess I got beat to it, but I'm eggcited to say eggsactly what the eggs say.
I know I'm bad at this, but I hope you will crack up anyway.
Why does the orange 🍊 beat the other fruits 🍎 in every race?
Because it never runs out of juice.
What do world hunger and a Mercedes have in common?
Princess Diana couldn't stop both of them.
What does a broken down vegetable say?
I need new wheels.
What do dairy products praise? Cheeseus.
What do cats eat for breakfast?
"Mice Krispies!"
Why did the students eat their homework?
Because the teacher said it would be a piece of cake! 🎂😂
Why are french fries rude?
"Pull down your pants, pull out my willy, stir your guts round like a hot bowl of chili."
Americans: I will cook the pizza.
Italians: I cooka de pizza!
What do strippers and butter have in common?
Both spread for bread.
What's the LGBTQ+'s favorite cereal?
Fruity Pebbles.
What's the difference between a gay man and a freezer?
A freezer doesn't scream when you put meat inside it.
Did you hear about the woman who put her husband’s ashes in a burrito?
He gets to tear that ass up one more time.