Food jokes
What did the tomato say to the tomato ketchup?
What’s the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
If a vegan and a vegan have a fight, is it still considered beef?
Say the drive through at McDonald's, order (don't say the sake) but when you get it ask them, "My sake?" and say, "Sake that ass."
What happens to the crow in the earthquake?
It turned into a milkshake. 🤔😂
Memes
Life is like a box of chocolates. It doesn’t last as long for fat people.
Dude, your last name sounds like a seafood shop, Jordan C.!
Do nut get in my way.
What is the difference between a bag of chips and a gun?
If you pull one of them suddenly, everybody wants to be your friend.
Maybe Soy Milk is just milk introducing itself in Spanish! (Soy means "I am" in Spanish).
What do you call a pig at the beach?
Bacon.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan? Apes get picked.
Dino nuggets are kinda hot. Also, I want to fuck the brown M&M.
What has to be broken before you can use it?
Answer: An egg.
What do you mean cook? We wait till summer.
"I know, you have a lot on your plate right now."
Being an orphan always has an upside; for instance, a bag of chips is family-sized.
What do you call a cow that doesn't give milk?
A milk dud!
You scream, I scream, we all scream for ice cream!
Why did the orphan want to go to jail?
So he could have a home and be cared for with food.