Food jokes
What do chicken on a plancha and emos have in common?
They both are hung.
What does Stephen Hawking put his food in? A microwave.
I am like Cookie Monster on steroids when it comes to cookies.
Don't crack this joke up!
Do nut get in my way.
Memes
Do nut get in my way.
What is the difference between a bag of chips and a gun?
If you pull one of them suddenly, everybody wants to be your friend.
If you were a fruit, you’d be a ‘fine-apple.’
Time flies like an arrow.
Fruit flies like a banana.
Where is Freshfry?
Why is it good to be an orphan?
Because every bag of chips is family sized.
Milk (DYM 115).
What is it called when corn stalks have a baby?
The cream of the crop.
You say this to your friend, "Damn, your nuts are bigger than mine!" *thinks the wrong way*.
Friend: I must order more nuts.
What should I call a burger?
A cow burger.
What's the difference between humans and mushrooms? I don't like eating mushrooms.
Maybe Soy Milk is just milk introducing itself in Spanish! (Soy means "I am" in Spanish).
What's a dumbfuck's favorite condiment to put on his burger?
Re-tarter sauce.
Why don't cows make good policemen?
Because they refuse to go on steak-outs!
Q: How do you get 50 babies in a bucket?
A: With a blender!
Q: How do you take them out?
A: With Doritos!