Food jokes
My mom was telling me about different pastas. So many pastabilities!
If my mom decides to get Chick-fil-A for dinner, and when I decide to eat my family for dinner, is that called cannibalism?
What do you call someone who’s afraid of breaststroke? Chicken breast.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple always gets picked.
What dessert do you get on September 11th?
An ice cream flight!
Memes
Shitpost-master general
Why do most orphans cook for themselves?
They don't have a home cook.
I got fired from the M&M Factory because I sorted out the W's.
Why were the Twin Towers so mad?
Because they ordered pepperoni, but instead they got plain!
What did the neutron say to the atom?
"Sandwiches, dude!"
What do you call Panera bread when it’s on top of someone?
Panera head.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Nacho.
Nacho who?
Nacho Cheese!
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Donut.
What do you call a fat Chinese person that talks way too much? Panda Express.
What do you call cheese that is not your cheese?
Nacho cheese.
Orphans have tasted all cookies except for homemade ones.
What do you call seagulls that fly over the bay? Bagels.
If I had a dime for everytime the Australian president shat himself in a McDonald's, I would have one dime, which is not a lot, but it's weird that it happened.
What's the difference between a human and a potato? There is none, you can eat both.
Making a comforting breakfast.
But you have a knife.
Why was the cookie angry? Because someone ate the chips!