Food jokes
Did you hear the pickle joke?
It's actually a really big dill.
Why can Chinese people play baseball?
Because they ate the bat.
What do you get when you cross a turkey and a centipede?
Drumsticks for everyone!
What’s the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?
The wheelchair.
What's the difference between a dead baby and an orange?
I don't keep a trash bag full of oranges in my basement.
My sis told me that onions are the only food that can make you cry...
So I threw a coconut at her.
What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?
The wheelchair.
Fork pierces the flesh. Guided by hunger's demand, Savoury feast waits.
Tines dig deep within, Seeking the sustenance craved, A mealtime delight.
Belly grumbles loud, Yearning for nourishment's touch, Fork answers the call.
Food on the platter, Fork dances with anticipation, To satiate hunger's plea.
Digestion begins, Fork's journey now complete, Nourishing the soul.
Why does the fork go? To bring joy to empty hearts, Satiating needs.
In the stomach's depths, Fork finds purpose and solace, A culinary bond.
With each mealtime tale, The fork carves memories deep, In stomachs it rests.
What do you call a group of masturbating cows?
Beef stroganoff.
Yo momma so fat, her ankle broke and gravy poured out.
Broccoli says, "I look like a tree."
Walnut says, "I look like a brain."
Cashew says, "I look like a kidney."
Banana says, "Can we change the topic please?"
What's the difference between a baby and an onion?
One cries when you peel its skin off, the other makes you cry when you peel its skin off.
A colon can completely change the meaning of a sentence.
Jane ate her friend’s sandwich.
Jane ate her friend’s colon.
What's a rapper's favorite candy?
Mike and Ikes.
Caesar went to the future only to see how the Romans forgot Julius Caesar but only made a salad... I think it would have been better if Caesar stayed dead.
What is Meat Loaf's new name now that he has passed?
Ground beef.
What type of cake can't orphans eat?
Home made.
1. What do you call a dinosaur that is sleeping?
A dino-snore!
2. What is fast, loud, and crunchy?
A rocket chip!
3. Why did the teddy bear say no to dessert?
Because she was stuffed!
4. What has ears but cannot hear?
A cornfield!
5. What did the left eye say to the right eye?
Between us, something smells!
Why I can’t be skinny? I hurt myself for fatting. - Jenny
Hello please I want gain wait. - Jenny year later.
Ass cream.