Food jokes
Yesterday my mom forgot to go grocery shopping, and I was starving, so I kept opening the fridge about 100 times, but nothing new was in there.
Why did oozy go to the toilet to eat trains?
What did the Turkey say to the other Turkey?
"They forgot the stuffing!"
What did the fat guy say to the tree?
"Get me some coconuts!"
"Hey, I heard you were a bit down—where's John?"
"He died."
"Oh, I'm so sorry, but I got you food."
(After they eat) "Hey, how did John taste seasoned and cooked?"
They are delicious.
What is the difference between apples and orphans?
The apples get picked.
What do teachers eat? They eat square stuff.
Your mum is so fat, she thought Dunkin' Donuts was a basketball team.
Your sister is so stupid, she only thinks an onion will make people cry.
So I threw a coconut at her.
Did you hear what happened to the Italian chef?
He pasta-way...
Yankee Doodle went to town riding on a pony. He opened up a pasta shop and made some macaroni.
Why do orphans hate cereal?
Because their dad never came back with the milk.
Your mom is so fat, that burger.
What happened when the corn got scolded? He got an earful!
What do you call it when you sell Panera Bread in your shed?
Panera Shed.
How do you call a very good lemonade?
Fantatastic!
What do monkeys eat for dinner? KFC.
Me running from the table where the Emo table with a happy meal.
Me running from the table where the Emos sit with a Happy Meal.