Food jokes
What did the clock do when it was hungry? It went back four seconds.
Every culture has weird food.
Australians eat vegemite. The British eat haggis. The French eat snails. The Chinese eat dogs. The Americans eat their young siblings' private parts.
I went to a truck on wheels, they said, "Wheel feed you."
Why does the retard not like eating his vegetables? Because he knows not to be a cannibal, he knows somehow.
If you feel sad, or you feel that you are not loved... You're with mushroom pizza.
Waitress: You wanna box for your leftovers?
Me: No, but I'll arm wrestle you for the bill.
What kind of milk does a new age calf drink?
Dairy free.
What’s the difference between peanut butter and a dead baby?
Dogs only lick peanut butter off private parts.
What is an orphan's favorite flower? Self-raising. 😂
What is the difference between apples and orphans?........... The apple gets picked.
What flour do orphans use whilst making cakes? Self-raising.
Did you hear about the new emo pizza? It cuts itself.
Have you ever had Ethiopian food??
Neither have they.
"Oh, waiter! Waiter!"
"Yes, sir?"
"Do you have frog's legs?"
"Why, yes."
"Good. Now hop along and get me a steak!"
I’ve seen more life in a bowl of WEEK-OLD GUACAMOLE than in BLESSEDBRIAN’S jokes.
Want to save 50% on your Chinese?
Just ask before you pay.
Why don’t Belgians eat shit sandwiches?
They don’t fancy bread!
Where did the cake sleep on the stove?
In a pan.
If you are a banana, why don't you eat a banana?
Oh right, you'd be a cannibal. I mean a banan-i-ball.
What do you eat out of?
- A bowl.