Fall jokes
I told a joke to a guy who had jumped off a bridge... He was in bits! 🤣🤦‍♂️
President Joe Biden was jogging through some different jogging paths around this great county we live in and was jogging through Alabama and fell off into a swamp filled with killer alligators, and these 3 boys named Willie, Roman, and Little Johnny saw him fall in and jumped in and drug him to safety, and the president was like "Thank you, thank you, thank you SOOO much. I'm gonna give you boys a reward for saving my life," and asks them what their names were and what they wanted. The first boy said, "My name's Willy, and I want to go to Disneyland," and the president said, "No problem, and I'll take you personally." The 2nd boy said, "My name's Roman, and I want an autographed pair of Air Jordan Nikes," and the president said, "No troubles at all," and the 3rd boy says, "My name's Little Johnny, and I want a power wheelchair with an awesome stereo and killer wheels," and the president says, "You don't look handicapped, Little Johnny," and Little Johnny said, "I'm not, but as soon as I tell my parents who I saved, I will be"🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Interviewer: What are your strengths?
Interviewee: I fall in love easily.
Interviewer: And your weaknesses?
Interviewee: Those beautiful green eyes of yours...
Why does a leaf fall faster than an emo kid? Because the emo hangs itself.
Why did the orphan fall out of a tree?
They thought their parents would catch them.
How did the Apple and the emo fall off the tree at the same time?
Because Paul Walker crashed into it.
A bus full of nuns falls off a cliff and they all die. They arrive at the gates of heaven and meet St. Peter. St. Peter says to them, “Sisters, welcome to Heaven. In a moment I will let you all through the pearly gates, but before I may do that, I must ask each of you a single question.”
St. Peter turns to the first nun in the line and asks her, “Sister, have you ever touched a penis?” The Sister responds, “Well... there was this one time... that I kinda sorta... touched one with the tip of my pinky finger...” St. Peter says, “Alright Sister, now dip the tip of your pinky finger in the Holy Water, and you may be admitted.” and she did so.
St. Peter now turns to the second nun and says, “Sister, have you ever touched a penis?” “Well.... There was this one time... that I held one for a moment...” “Alright Sister, now just wash your hands in the Holy Water, and you may be admitted” and she does so.
Now at this, there is a noise, a jostling in the line. It seems that one nun is trying to cut in front of another! St. Peter sees this and asks the Nun, “Sister Susan, what is this? There is no rush!” Sister Susan responds, “Well if I’m going to have to gargle this stuff, I’d rather do it before Sister Mary sticks her ass in it!”
Me: Want to play 911?
My little brother: What's that?
Me: It's where I kick your legs and you fall.
What takes 10 seconds to go SLPAT! on the ground?
9/11 victim!
What fell down the tree first, the emo or the apple?
Guess what? The apple, because the emo got left hanging.
What's the difference between an emo kid and a leaf? Only the leaf reaches the ground.
I hope you have to pull hard on a candy wrapper only for the bag to pop and have the candy fall on the floor.
I hope you have to squeeze the hell out of toothpaste only for the little bit to fall down the sink drain.
Some people could say that the sky was falling that day,
one second they saw the sun and the next they saw heaven.
Which one fell first?
The depressed kid or the feather? Look at 1st comment to see answer.
"Did it hurt when you fell from Heaven? You're adopted. Haley says she likes me more than you."
What's the difference between an apple and an emo kid?
One falls, while the other hangs.
Joe mama so fat, she fell on both sides of the bed.
Why did Stephen Hawking fall over?
'Cause he had a screw loose!
Why are emo kids the best jumpers?
Because they never fall down.