What did the 1.8 nanosecond old baby get for his birthday?
Nailed to a puppy falling on a buzz saw being crushed in a hydraulic press while being set on fire.
Fall Jokes
Yo mama so ugly, she made everybody's face fall off.
Why do flamingos sleep with one leg up?
Because if they slept with both legs up, they would fall over!
My mama always told me, don't pick your nose or it will fall off! I thought she meant my nose.
Hey, give me a break! I'm a little shorthanded!
Oh no, not rock paper scissors again! I always lose. Come on guys, I just lost my finger a day ago! This is Tony, later on.
Why did the tall building fall?
It was September 11th.
Sally jumped out a plane, she forgot her parachute!
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Not Sally...
How did she die?
A bomb came down whilst falling through the sky.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
A bomb.
"Why did Susie fall off the swing?" "Because she had no arms."
"Why couldn’t she get up off the ground?" "Because she had no friends."
"Knock knock." "Who’s there?" "Not Susie, she’s still on the ground."
"Where did Susie go when the bomb went off?" "Everywhere."
"Why couldn’t Susie scratch her leg?" "Because it was in a different body bag."
"Why did Susie drop her ice cream?" "She was hit by a bus."
"Why did Susie fall off the swing?" "Someone threw a refrigerator at her."
I'll never forget my grandfather's last words: "STOP SHAKING THE LADDER, YOU LITTLE CUNT!"
What did the pillow say as it fell off the bed?
Oh sheet!
Why did Bob fall? Because gravity was mad at him.
Why did Suzy fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.
Knock knock. Who’s there? Not Suzy.
Why did Shelley fall off the swing? She had no arms.
I saw a sign that said, "Falling Rocks." I tried it, and it doesn't.
What did the man say after he slipped and fell on the ice? Nothing, he just gave everyone the cold shoulder.
You're probably getting tired of these gravity jokes... but I keep falling for them every time.
Where do dogs go when their tails fall off?
To the retail store.
I was born yesterday, and I walked down memory lane. I fell over the edge!
Francis Pope, Donald Trump, Barack Obama, and a little boy were on a falling airplane. There were 3 parachutes. Donald Trump grabs the first parachute and jumps off the plane saying, “The world needs my leadership!” Barack Obama grabs a parachute and says, “I need to help make choices for our world,” so he jumps off the plane. At this point, the Pope and the little boy are on the plane. The Pope says to the boy, “take the last parachute, I am too old and I’m going to die soon one day.” The little boy says, “actually there are two, you see, Donald Trump took my backpack.”
My brother couldn’t wait for fall, so I tripped him.
Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Because he was dead.
