Exercise jokes

Don’t have a bike? You can mount me instead.

My doctor said I need to lose calories, so I got a piece of paper, wrote "calories," and lit it on fire.

What’s an Emo’s favorite exercise?

The dead hang.

What is the difference between runners and my car?

My car is still running.

I used to be into fitness. But running from my problems got exhausting.

Why do rappers love the gym?

'Cause they're all about them heavy bars.

I did a good walk and walk, walk home, and walk, walk home from school, and walk, walk home, and walk, walk home from school, and walk, walk home, and walk, walk home from school, and walk, walk home, and walk, walk home from school, and walk, walk home, and walk, walk home from school, and people live in the house with my dog. I had to a dog and.

What does a person eat before a race?

Answer: They fast.

What is Jesus' favorite sport? CrossFit.

What is Jesus’s Favorite Exercise?

CrossFit.

My fitness guru said that if I got raped, it would help me in future marathons.

They say during sex you burn off as many calories as running 8 miles. Who the fuck runs 8 miles in 30 seconds?

I did a walk today and I had to walk home from school and walk walk home from school and walk walk home from home and walk walk home and I had a good time with you and walk home from home and walk walk home and I had to.

What is a fat boy's favorite karate move?

A pork chop.

What’s a lung’s favorite type of exercise?

Breathing exercises.

I told this to my English teacher, and he said it to the class, and no one laughed. Someone help!

What's the slogan for a Muslim gym?

Might in dynamite.

Why do some couples go to the gym together?

Because they want their relationship to work out.

What do you call a vagina with multiple clits?

A tongue workout!

I named my dog "5 miles," so now I can tell people I walk "5 miles" everyday. 😏😎

I did a walk today, but I had a walk home from a walk. Walk today, but it when.