Exercise jokes

Q: Why is Japan the healthiest country?

A: Last time they had a fat man, 80,000 people died.

You're losing all your friends, but never any calories.

There was a boy in the gym who was in his late teens. He was sitting at the dumbbells tables, but he wasn't lifting. He instead, sat up and was ripping something up.

The manager then walked over to him and asked, "You're hogging the dumbbells, dude! What are you even doing?" The boy hesitated, then said, "Getting ripped, wanna join me?" as he held up stacks of blank paper. The man silently sat on the table with him and grabbed some papers. "Why not?" he finally said.

I don’t know why I go to the gym. Being healthy is dying as fast as possible, and I really want to speed that shit up.

Walking's a chore, let alone crawling.

So I went to the gym and I found a hymn.

Wow, you did 10 chin-ups? Was it 1 for each chin?

Yo mama so fat, when she decides to workout, the stock market goes bankrupt.

Lean.

Run, bestie, run!

Exercise? I thought you said "extra fries."

Walking is just running with extra steps.

What happens when animals do a squat?

It doesn't become pretty...

Yo mama is so unfamiliar with the gym, she calls it James.

What kind of jokes doesn’t work out?

Fat people jokes.

At gym class today, my friend made this song:

🎵 I’m a Barbie girl, I am fantastic, my boobs are plastic!

Why I can’t be skinny? I hurt myself for fatting. - Jenny

Hello please I want gain wait. - Jenny year later.

What’s a rapper’s favorite EXERCISE?

Flexin’.

I did a walk.

Entered what I ate today into my new fitness app, and it just sent an ambulance to my house.