If a man drove over a woman, whose fault was it?
The man, because he shouldn't be driving in the kitchen.
What do SpongeBob and Asian have in common?
They're both yellow and can't drive
A guy goes onto a rooftop bar, and is sitting next to a guy who says he's drinking a magical drink. He asks "What's so magical about it?" the guy drives a car and flies it around the rooftop. the other tries, but falls of and dies.
The bartender shakes his head, and says.
"Y'know, you're a real jerk when you're drunk superman.
How come when women decide to kill their unborn baby its a "choice". But when I decide to drive my car into a playground full of children its called "murder".
why did the boy get run over ? sally was driving
Alcoholics don't run in my family, they drive!
A cop pulls a guy over for suspected drunk driving. The cop opens the door and the driver falls out onto the asphalt. The cop says, "Holy shit, you're so drunk, you can't even walk!"
The drunk says, "No shit, that's why I took my car!"
How many orphans does it take to "test drive" a bus? It depends on how much space the orphanage has and how much space the cemmetary has.
The weirdest thing happend to me today i was driving 50mph and hit a speedbump aand it screamed
Where did JFK go in his car? I am not sure of his intentional destination but he did go everywhere
I was driving and accidentally hit a crippled kid, they were still breathing so I told them to walk it off.
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
Why can't Helen Keller drive?
Because she's a woman.
your teeth are so spread out my mom can drive her car through the gap in your teeth
My daughter said i could never make a car out of spaghetti, you should have seen the look on her face when I drove pasta!!!!
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
I was driving with my parent and shouted its a super hero but i didnt know it was a emo kid
A man is driving down the road and runs over a rabbit, he slams on his brakes, gets out and walks up to the flattened bunny. The bunny is obviously expired. A passing car slams on it’s brakes and screeches to a halt. The driver of that car runs up to the bunny pulls out an aerosol can and sprays the bunny with the aerosol spray. The Bunny jumps up runs a few feet, then stops, turns around and waves it’s paw at the two men. Runs away a few more feet, stops, turns around and waves at the two men. Runs away a few more feet, stops, turns around and waves at the two men. He continues to do this until he’s out of sight. The first driver looks at the man with the aerosol can and says “Wow that is amazing, what is in that can” the man looks at the can and reads the label “Hair restorer, with a permanent wave”.
Americans be like: Here is the US, we drive on the right side of the road.
England be like: Here in the UK, we drive on the left side of the road.
Russians after a car accident be like: Here in Russia, road is road.
