Difference jokes
What's the difference between a dog and a foster child?
A dog doesn't run to the police after you beat it.
What's the difference between Obama and Trump?
Obama was a president and Trump was a whiny bitch!
What's the difference between an orphan's life and a knife?
A knife has a point.
What can a dwarf do standing up that a tall person can't do standing up?
Perform fellatio.
What's the difference between a high street betting firm and a prostitute?
You can get on with a prostitute!
What's the difference between Stephen Hawking and a baby? The baby is still alive.
What's the difference between Andy and acne?
Acne waited until Adam could talk before coming on his face.
What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon?
One is fun to hit with a sledge hammer, and the other is just a watermelon.
What's the difference between broccoli and a booger?
Kids won't eat broccoli.
What's the difference between a white woman and a tornado siren?
The tornado siren doesn't get raped.
What's the difference between a baby and a ball?
If you inflate the ball, it won't explode.
What's the difference between jam and jelly?
You can't jelly your way into someone's pants.
How do you tell the difference between a Communist and everybody else? The way they are spelled.
What is the difference between a blond and a Nazi?
The blond survived.
What is the difference between a banana and a helicopter? Neither of them is a police officer.
What's the difference between cancer and a baby?..
There is none.
What's the difference between Elton John and rapboat?
Elton is talented, rich, and openly gay. Rapboat got fuck all talent, no money, and is not out of the closet yet.
You know the difference between happy tailgaters and angry tailgaters?
Happy tailgaters know how to throw a party.
What's the difference between fruit and a freshly killed corpse?
I don't eat the fruit.
What's the difference between a chicken and me? None, they both don't watch right and left before crossing the road.